About the Author

At (in)courage, we empower women to be like Jesus. Our writers share what’s going on in their life and how God’s right in the middle of it. They bring their joys & struggles so that you can feel less alone and be empowered by the hope Jesus gives.

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things we love
& you will too!
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Reader Interactions


  1. I have struggled with the “looking back” for almost 40 years! This has given me much food for thought- thank you!

  2. OMG! So needed this today and in this season of life. Wanting desperately to look back on things I miss that once filled my life – career, grandkids, a younger me (approaching 60). Sometimes I feel the best of my life is over. Instead of looking ahead to what God has for me next. Glory days are in every season of life as long as God is in them. We just have to push past our own ideals and agenda. Seek Him above all else. As long as I’m looking back, I can’t move forward.

  3. AMEN! The Lord has REALLY used “Burn the Ships” by For King and Country (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOVrOuKVBuY) in my life at these moments. There are times I feel their music doesn’t quite fulfil what I need in a Christian song, but then God reminds me He can use ANYTHING! He did so with this song, ’cause if I’m honest at first I wasn’t sure I would have called this a Christian song that should be on Christian radio the first times I heard it, BUT then life became a Season of Worshipping God through struggles and painful changes/decisions and Burn the Ships kept coming up at JUST THE RIGHT MOMENTS and it became a balm to my soul! May it be used to Encourage others to not be like Lot’s wife!

  4. This hit me right in the kisser. This is me exactly. Yes, I find this so hard to do. I know I must look forward not back. God forgave me and wants me to look towards the future.

  5. Thank you for reminding us to live in ‘today’. As I have turned past the corner of 70 years old, I am getting better at not trying to compare myself – especially the physical self – to what or who I was at 50. I can’t wear the same clothes I used to; but they’d be out of style anyway. I can’t keep up with some of the younger gals at the gym, but I can out ‘garden’ them any day. The best part of accepting where I am today is that I have grown in my relationship with God. The time I could spend worrying about what I can’t do is now spent on staying connected to God in all things. No time to waste looking back…..God has filled my future (our future) with so many beautiful things I don’t need to be reminded of what was…..I have a lifetime of what is to be.

  6. Dear Simi….I love your story today.I wish I could join your group, but I don’t do social media as so far I have been scammed for $30,000 which I did not get back. I love (in)courage and I have finished that book, but I am starting to read it all over again as it helped me so much the first time. I did have an old pair of jeans, same as you, and I just ditched them. I knew I would never fit into them again. I am 76 years old and I am going through a very difficult situation. My husband has dementia (the violent kind) an I tried for 3 and a half years to get him out of denial. I tried all my managerial skills (45 years), but nothing worked. It is 6 years now and he is still in denial and I had to evict him from our house of 40 years before he killed me and did not remember. All my doctor and his doctors and my support groups that help Caregivers in this situation told me the same thing. We have been married for 55 years, but can no longer live together. Unfortunately, the story doesn’t end there. We have one son and one grandson. My son kept telling me I was lying. It is just old age Mom. I even read him part of the written report by the psychoneurologist. Before his father almost killed me he called me one night and said, ” you are a liar and do not refer to me as your son as I no longer consider you my Mother.” He hung up. He is 54 years old and this is the most heart-breaking thing I have ever experienced. He and his wife also have brainwashed my 13 year old grandson into thinking I am an evil person. They rip up all the cards I send to him before he gets home from school. On his 13th birthday last October, I sent him 2 cards, with a $100 check for his birthday. he never got them and the check was never cashed as they did not open the cards. I know we should not look back, but since I had to sell our house, it has been 15 months and the property settlement has still not happened. We both need the money, but my son is trying to get my half. Both of our lawyers are dragging their feet and I don’t know how much time I have yet. I pray all the time and do your books, but I have still not gotten a “sign”. I have no other family. My friends all have husbands and are my age with big families. They don’t know what else to say to me so they just don’t call. Many days I cry most of the day. I do know that God is not done with me, but I pray that he gives me enough time until my grandson realizes that his parents were not telling me the truth. Thank you so much Simi for your story. I really wish I could join your class. Please have a Blessed Day and I am so sorry I rambled on. Betsy Basile

    • I am so sad to read this Betsy. That is a huge amount of loss that you have gone through. Maybe searching for a grief counselor or a group to support you through all of this would be helpful. You are in my prayers.

    • Heartbreaking! Stay strong in God’s love for you, and His understanding of the truth of your circumstances. Praying for your son that he would be enlightened to the reality of his dad and be reconciled with you to support and protect you, and protection for your grandson’s heart, that he would seek a relationship with you.

  7. AMEN \0/

    ….just went through my closet…again…trying on the same beloved favorites that I know don’t fit, but I’ve been hanging onto. This time though, I was finally ready to pass them along and stop looking back. Prayers for the young or older lady that finds them at the second hand store and falls in love and starts their own memories…..xoxox

  8. Oh, my Friend, do I ever struggle with this. The past few years have brought a lot of loss and change, so wanting to hold on to the past has been like a weighted blanket. I wanted the warmth and comfort of it but realized I couldn’t move because it was SO heavy. It’s only now that I am almost on the other side of it that I can see how stuck I was. God has so much more for me! I am beginning to see it. I am not alone. He is right here with me, leading me. Philippians 3:13-14 is the perfect scripture. Thank you!


  9. Jeans from high school . Nope. No 501s left from that era but I remember thinking I was “fat”. That was 5 sizes ago and I WISH I was that size! That attitude of thinking “now is less than” is what I continue to have to lay down at the feet of Jesus. Embracing with joy the NOW God has me in needs to be my focus

    Thank you for the reminder.

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