One of my all-time favorite movies is Hook. This 1991 film features Robin Williams as a grown-up Peter Pan who’s forgotten who he really is. After Captain Hook kidnaps his children, Peter travels to Neverland to be reunited with the Lost Boys, Wendy, and his childhood self.
Fans of this movie might name other moments that move them, but for me, the most touching scene is when Peter meets his friends again for the first time in years — and they don’t recognize him. One little boy, rather than fight him or call him names, walks right up to Robin Williams’ character. He pulls him down to his level, removes his glasses, and gently puts his hands on either side of the man’s face. He squishes and pulls on his forehead and cheeks until his eyes light up. He recognizes his friend!
“There you are, Peter.”
I felt a little like grown-up Peter Pan the other day in the Starbucks drive-thru line.
Stopping on my way to work, I ordered my iced latte and pulled around to the window. When a woman leaned out to hand me my drink, she took a second look and said, “You look familiar. Are you from Lawson?”
I acknowledged that I was, indeed, from that very small town and told her my maiden name. Recognition immediately brightened her face and she told me her name. We made small-town small talk for a minute more, then I was on my way. But I couldn’t stop thinking about the way she knew who I was.
Our families had gone to church together for maybe a year or two. Nearly 40 years ago! She was several years ahead of me in school, and even her younger brother was two years older than me and not a close friend. But somehow she looked at my 44-year-old face, tired and full and a little bit wrinkled, and she could see me in there. It was a Hook-level miracle!
I’m currently in a season of transition and change — and a little unsure of who I am today. Am I reverting to who I was? Am I becoming someone completely different? Can I hold onto any parts from before? Are they even in there? What determines who I am? Is it my status or role or relationship to others? Is it my personality type or Enneagram number or generation or birth order? Is it the job I used to have or the one I have now? Is it the things I do today or the ones I still dream of doing?
Have you ever had these questions?
Perhaps it was a career change, milestone birthday, or a chance run-in with a long-forgotten acquaintance that prompted your own wonderings. Maybe you became a parent or lost a parent, changed marital status or moved to a new state, or experienced something as small as coloring your hair or putting away your signature sneakers. Any number of things can trigger an avalanche of questions that add up to, “Who am I?” and “Does anyone see me? The real me?”
As I’ve pondered all this (and repeatedly revisited that sweet scene in Hook), I’ve also remembered Psalm 139. It’s a popular passage, and for good reason. Who doesn’t crave the reminder that we are wonderfully made by a wonderful Creator (verse 14)? In this psalm, David talks about how God created him and knew him from the very beginning. God created us too, of course. He created our inmost beings and knitted us together in our mothers’ wombs (verse 13).
But that’s not where the story ends (or begins). Though David looks back and praises God for His creativity and artistry and care for each one of His children, he actually begins this song to the Lord by saying, “You have searched me, LORD, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways” (verses 1-3).
God knows us. He is familiar with all our ways.
No matter how old we get…
No matter how many wrinkles decorate our faces…
No matter how much our jeans size or job title changes…
The God of this universe, my Creator and yours, my heavenly Father and yours, knows us. He knows exactly who we were and exactly who we are. He searches us just like the little Lost Boy in Hook, squishing and smoothing all the things we carry, all the things that change, all the ways the world imprints on our hearts and minds and bodies. He searches us and He knows us.
God knows who you are. He knows who I am. God knows us and loves us, as we were and as we are right now.
If you’re going through a time of transition, change, or uncertainty, I pray that you remember that the One who created you still knows you. He will always recognize you. Nothing you or I can do will stop God from looking at us with love and saying, “There you are!”
Julie Garmon says
So good! ❤️
Mary Carver says
Thanks, Julie. I’m glad it spoke to you!
d from Canada says
That was such a BEAUTIFUL devotional Mary ~ Thank You
marycarver@live.com says
You’re so welcome. Thank you for being here!
Dawn Ferguson-Little says
Mary so true so Good. Like it tell us all that in that Psalm 139. All you said is so true. Just like the Father’s Love Letter you get on YouTube. You can get the short version and the long version on YouTube. Both are excellent. They like Psalm 139. Tell us how much our Heavenly Father thinks of us. How much he knew us even before we where born. How amazing is that. God knows who we are as he made us in our mothers wombs. Amazing it even says that in Psalm 139 and all our days are recorded in God’s book before any of them ever began. That is another amazing fact. I could go on and on. You also I have to say this last thing. Did the best thing for all man kind to show your love for us all. That was sent your one and only son Jesus to die for us. No greater love was that. So as our sins would be forgiven we get to Glory with you. If we asked you to our Lord and Salvation and come to be our Heavenly Father. I thank you Lord for doing that all because you Love us all. Thank you. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little Enniskillen Co. Fermanagh N.Ireland. xx Love today’s reading. ❤️
marycarver@live.com says
Such amazing truths!
Trina says
Thank you Mary. I am struggling with my worth and value to God. Sometimes I feel like a little ant, roaming around, doing little things for a big God and asking God “Do you see me”? I know He is there in the everyday day life, but sometimes (maybe more) I feel irrelevant to God, to others and to myself. But, when I see the struggle and heartache of so many people, especially now, in this darkened world, I pray that these people feel God’s presence and love and they know they are worthy and valued. As I pray, that is when I feel God’s small voice saying” You matter, everyone matters and I sent my son to die for all because of my everlasting love for this world”! Thank you, Jesus, my Lord, God and Savior!
marycarver@live.com says
Yes, yes. Joining you in prayer that we all feel God’s love, Trina.
Kathie B says
This brought tears to my eyes this morning. I am going through a period in my life where I am wondering who I am. Am I the me I see in the mirror each morning, with family and job and life responsibilities, or is there still a trace of the old me, the one who danced in the rain and jumped in the car for a road trip at the drop of a hat, in there as well? Do I like the me of right now? And if not, what do I want ME to look like? But God, He knows. He knows the old me, the me of today and the me that’s coming tomorrow and the day after and the day after that. And the best part, He accepts and loves all of them. I thank you for this reminder of that. It’s just what I needed to hear this morning.
marycarver@live.com says
Kathie, I hear you. And I’m so grateful this was encouraging to you.
Gail says
Mary, this is beautiful!
marycarver@live.com says
Thank you, Gail. I’m so glad you’re here in this space!
Gwen Griffiths says
Thank you for this encouragement today. I realized while reading that I’m the same age as you, sometimes experiencing that same question—who am I? And then, who is God calling me to be? And how do I get there?
marycarver@live.com says
Maybe it’s common for women in this season? I’m glad you’re here, Gwen, and pray that God makes His presence and love for you felt today!
Carolyn Olschner says
I didn’t listen to your podcast, but read your wonderful essay! I found it all so very uplifting! Thank you, Cathy! I love you!,
Carolyn O.
Janet W says
Thank you Mary xoxoxo \0/
I’m passing this reminder on and on and on……
Beth Williams says
Mary,
I’m in a season of funk. The past few years have brought many changes. First Covid hit & many left the hospitals. Then my unit got shut down & I was moved to an ICU Covid unit (working as a clerical). For a while I enjoyed it & prayed for a fulltime position. They offered me one & of course I accepted. Then one Tuesday night the other clerical just quit. Suddenly I was faced with stocking 28 ICU rooms & not doing much clerical work at all. Feel like a failure at times. Not using any of the training or knowledge I have. Tried applying for other jobs but always met with closed doors. God is the one who gave me this job & it comes with a 3-day weekend each week plus any overtime. In that respect I like it. Now I just need to find the old happy me & bring her back.
Blessings 🙂
Sandy says
Praying for you Beth – this morning that you soon find your old happy self… it’s obvious you miss and need her!!
marycarver@live.com says
Ahhh, Beth, I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. But as you know, God is with you and has a good, good plan for you!
Sandy says
Thank you Mary. I’ve recently retired after 30 years in ministry – and I’m still trying to find a consistent new spiritual routine – where I feel I’m “recognizable”..
marycarver@live.com says
A change in career (maybe especially when it’s something so consuming and defining, like ministry) is hard on the identity! Praying you feel God walking with you through this transition!
karyn j says
well, this was perfect and just what i needed today! in fact, i youtubed that scene to be reminded of your reference. (that was such a cute scene!) i’m a phase in life where i’m having to open up and see who i am in this season. i’m learning the actions, self-defeating thoughts, and perspectives that no longer serve me and the direction in which im going. as God said to jeremiah, i feel he is telling me in this moment. before you were formed in your mother’s womb, I knew you. all these years, He’s known me and knows who i am becoming. i may not always know, but God knows. and when i need it most, when i forget, or when i doubt, He will always remind me! i just have to trust and believe the Truth of His Word.
thank you for this, mary! this is the second time in the last week, i’ve tried to read a post and didn’t do so for a couple of days. but for this and the other, i read them both at JUST the right time!