About the Author

Holley Gerth is a Wall Street Journal bestselling author, counselor, and life coach. Her newest release is The Powerful Purpose of Introverts: Why the World Needs You to Be You. She's also wife to Mark, Mom to Lovelle, and Nana to Eula and Clem.

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things we love
& you will too!
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Reader Interactions


  1. Holley, this is wonderful! SEEing not rescuing. So practical & so much more Biblically sound than trying to be a superhero to those around us. Thank you for sharing this great insight! Blessings! ((0))

  2. I can so identify with trying to be a “Rescuer.” In fact, I attend a meaningful support group called Celebrate Recovery with “co-dependency” being my main issue. It has helped me so much to be aware of this tendency. Still room for improvement with the Lord’s help.

  3. My nature for most of my life —almost 70 years—has been to be a “fixer”. God has brought things into my life in the past few years that I can’t fix. I am slowly learning to stop trying to fix things and instead pray for peace of heart and strength to endure. But often I avoid people because I don’t know what to do or say. This devotional is one I will take to heart and hopefully help me to be a better friend.

  4. This is so good, Holley. Thank you. It’s an important distinction to be mindful of. I have tended to want to try to remove the pain for others, but it’s not mine to remove. I will try to keep this in mind and walk along side instead.

    • My counselor recently said, “Pain is one of the best teachers.” She was encouraging me to let people learn from their pain, not try to take it from them. SO HARD. I’m growing with you, Gail.

  5. WOW! I truly struggle with this! Please would you lift me up in prayer and my Mama (Linda) to! <3

  6. Holley,

    Women, especially, want to fix/rescue people. We think we know what they want or need. Job’s friends were like that. They tried to tell him the cause of his problems & how to fix them. All anyone really wants/needs is love & encouragement. Sit with us in our problems. Give us hugs & words of affirmation. Jesus walks with us through our trials & supports us. He doesn’t fix every single problem. He gives us His unconditional love & support. That is what we all need & want.

    Blessings 🙂