The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17 (NIV)
I struggle with perfectionism and the desire to be in control. The two go hand in hand, really.
Work projects? I take pride in executing my work perfectly and being known for doing my job well.
Mothering? It’s hard for me to resist the notion that my kids are my report card, that their behavior is a reflection of my parenting (instead of what it actually is — their behavior).
My home? I never clean as much as I do in the hour before company comes over. I’m like a whirling dervish with a vacuum. It’s not a good look for me.
In a twisted way, there’s something comforting about being in control, about completing tasks perfectly.
It’s embarrassing to admit, but I never really saw my perfectionist and controlling tendencies until I had kids. You know the saying that kids are mirrors? It’s true, and not always in a good way. I began to see my worst habits and most unflattering characteristics making appearances in my miniature me’s, and I wanted to squash the behavior before it could become rooted in their little hearts because I knew the pain it could — and would — bring. So at the slightest hint of my kids trying to behave their way into my heart, to earn my love, or to control their way into perfection, I give them huge hugs and many words of reassurance that there is nothing they can do to earn my love.
There is nothing they can do to earn my love. There is nothing they can do to earn my love. They simply have it. All my love. No matter what. Forever.
And then one day it was like a light bulb went off in my own heart: God says the same thing to us. God’s love isn’t something we earn by doing, by behaving, by controlling or being perfect.
There is nothing we can do to earn God’s love.
There is nothing we can do to earn God’s love.
There is nothing we can do to earn God’s love.
By God’s goodness and grace, He freely offers us His love — no perfect behavior or tally of earnings required. It’s one of the best, most incredible gifts we’re given — and often the hardest to accept.
The world rewards good behavior, and we’re taught from a young age that we need to work hard to earn things, right? God takes all that and turns it upside down.
The verses from Zephaniah illustrate such a beautiful juxtaposition. Empowered is an action word, and yet these verses show God as the one taking action, while our role is fairly passive. God is the one saving us. God is the one rejoicing. God is the one singing. God is the one loving us no matter what. There’s no way we can perfect our way into His heart or earn His love.
We can feel weaker, more desperate, more rock bottom than we’ve ever felt before, and we’re still loved by God.
His love doesn’t depend on us.
I whisper those words to my kids during tantrums, sad moments, and difficult times, reminding them that there is nothing they can do to earn my love; they simply have it forever. I pray we all take in the love we so undeservedly receive.
We are empowered for something we have no power over. And that is the best news ever.
Lord, I am humbled by Your love. Thank You for such a gift. Empower me to accept it, to remember that I cannot earn my way into Your heart, that I cannot control Your love for me. Give me the confidence to live this out in my everyday life. Amen.
Ruth Mills says
Amen! Dearest Lord empower us to not believe Satan’s lies that God’s presence & love is tied to our behavior! Thank you for sharing & this relatable example of God’s truth. Blessings!
jsommer says
I know this – He loves me – so why am I so afraid of His lessons or His sifting when life seems to cave in around me? I read Psalms and rest in David’s cries to Father. Yet I still have dread – coupled with firm surety that He will deliver us to a better place. The pain still hurts in the ‘life-ing’.
Ruth Mills says
Oh dear J, praying you will KNOW tangibly that His perfect love for you can cast out all your dreads. The struggle is part of being human. Yet God has already won the victory for you. When those dreads start to rise, remind Satan to leave you alone & practice gratitude & praise to the Victor. The switch of focus works to ease my dreads & I bet it will for you too. Blessings, heavenly sis!
Pearl Allard says
Great reminder.
Dawn Ferguson-Little says
Thank Anna for this reading. It reminds me of just how good God’s love is for us. That it cannot be earned as you. God loves us so much. Nothing will ever stop God loving us. It reminds me of the kids song I learnt at Sunday School when we. It true for us Adults. It reminds us of God’s love for us. It is that lovely song. “Jesus Love Me This I Know For The Bible Tells me So” How true that is for his word the Bible does tell us of how much God loves us. Even in that verse John 3verse 16. For God So Loved The World He Gave His Only Begotten Son” So that is in God’s word the Bible. It tells us God loved us enough to send his son to die for us. No greater Love was that. So that is why the kids song “Jesus Loves Me This I Know For The Bible Tells me So” is so true as it reminds us that God does loves us as his word the Bible tells us. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little keeping you all incourage in my prayers. Xx
Sandy says
Hi Anna,
To begin, I just want to say how much I enjoy your writing. There is always a hint of humour in your words, along with the truth of God’s Word.
This post is a great reminder that we don’t have to earn, strive or do anything to receive God’s love. It’s amazing the number of times we keep needing to read posts such as this so that it eventually sinks deep into our hearts, not just our minds. 🙂
Although I’m not a mom, most of your writings can apply to anyone, at any stage of their life. Thanks for this today! 🙂
Shalom, Sandy
Irene says
Anna, you hit this one out of the park! I so needed to hear this in this moment, this day, this week! Thank you!
Beth Williams says
Anna,
God’s gracious love constantly amazes me. I get awed during communion each week. Thinking that He died that horrible death just.for.me. The fact that He rejoices over me with singing even though I mess up often. WOW. There is no condemnation with God & nothing I can do to earn His love! Just accept it & share it with this world. Thanks for a great post!
Blessings 🙂
Susan Garrett says
Why do we have Podcast/ recording some days and not others? I really like listening.