About the Author

Anjuli grew up as a missionary kid secretly wondering, “Why does everyone else understand what a relationship with Jesus is, but me?” It wasn’t until she ran into her fears instead of from them, that Anjuli found her voice and the love of God meeting her there. She is a...

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  1. So true! Loving someone has much more of a chance of changing them then yelling as the top of your lungs!!!!
    Jesus used LOVE!

  2. Thank you. My husband and I have some differences that really bother me some times. I am more sensitive than he is. I carry more responsibility than he and it hits a nerve with me sometimes. What you say is true…the relationship is more important than always winning the argument or having the other person change their views/actions.

    • I totally agree Debbie! Same here! Thanks for this reply!

      And Anjuli, this is right on. I believe we are called to love with the love of Christ and this is truly transformative.

      Thanks for sharing ❤️
      erin

  3. Anjuli,

    Thank you for writing about this topic. I appreciate how you persevered in discussions with your friend despite his views being opposite of yours. I too abhor conflict. It is so much easier to agree to disagree and avoid talking about topics that are divisive. That you came to respect him, and possibly he came to respect you, is actually astonishing. I truly want to know how you handled the issue of racism that is inherent in certain political views. This is a painful sticking point for me since racism is anti- love, anti-Christian, anti- the teachings of Jesus. It is hard to love those who hate others, and even harder to stay in relationship with them.

    Jennifer

  4. Oh, I needed to see this today. I tend to get so hurt over posts and comments from friends who have views that differ from mine. Kindness, humility, and the ability to listen- without having to be right are all things I need to remember. Thank you for this beautifully written reminder.

  5. This is a program through story corp that works to encourage people to do just what you and Rick did, and the experiences of participants they’ve featured show they too could respect one another in spite of grave differences. Thank you for sharing your positive experience. It does instill hope.
    “This special program, One Small Step: Courageous Conversations Across A Growing Divide, explores the idea that intentional conversations between partisans could be a catalyst for national healing.”

  6. I will be sharing this with my sister and her daughter. They are going through issues right now and need to hear this. My prayer is they will both acknowledge the other is feeling hurt and they can’t change the past, but they can move forward and heal with God.

  7. Anjuli,

    I often have differing opinions than those of my friends. But because I can’t stand conflict, I simply agree to disagree & avoid certain topics with them. Simply put I love them the way they are-a flawed human just like me. Another tactic is to pray for them & the situation. God commands us to pray always about everything. That is basically what I do. Being right or not isn’t important. Showing this world more of God’s love is of utmost importance.

    Blessings 🙂

  8. Thank you so much for this. we all need to hear this especially as Christians. If it causes division, seperation and no unity it’s not from God. We all need to be kind and show God’s love through these uncertain times. We don’t have to agree however we need to respect each other and we all have the right to choose, and know that our example comes from the Bible and Christ himself. It’s so difficult these days and many think they have entitlement to behave the way they are. Let’s focus on what’s right in God’s eyes. Love, Joy, Peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. 🙂

  9. To tell the truth, I really like the message of your article and I totally share your point of view. In my opinion, it is really important not to think one-sidedly and accept only your worldview, but try to understand other people. I think that if we do not condemn another person who does not share our point of view and try to pick up something from him, we will only improve our personality. You are absolutely right that we shouldn’t change people, but we should love them because it reveals the best part of ourselves. I think that in this life we can change only ourselves and we need to strive for that by becoming more understanding and wiser. Of course, we all are mere mortals and we all make mistakes, but it doesn’t indicate that something is wrong with us. I think that it indicates that we all have our own path and we all have strengths and weaknesses, but in any case we all deserve love.