About the Author

Kim is a public high school teacher, mid-pack runner, minister’s wife, and mother of two grown sons. The thread of loneliness woven throughout her life nudged her to lean in close to the heart of God. She deeply desires for women to daily experience the intimate steadfast love of God.

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  1. Thank you for sharing this story. It helps me as I struggle with the changes my mother is going through…the changes we are going through.

    • Olivia,

      I have been there done that. Both parents had dementia in all stages. Praying for strength to endure this trial. May God give you the peace & comfort to handle each day.

      Blessings 🙂

  2. Hello, Kim…thank you for sharing your dad’s journey with dementia. You’re a loving daughter who’s integrating his past memories and enjoying him even more now, meeting him right where he’s at. God’s faithfulness is beautifully written in this story. Chris, The Woodlands, TX

    • God is so faithful. He shows up in more ways than we can imagine. I am grateful for the glimpses of His glory in the everday moments of my life.

  3. Thank you. My mother may be facing worsening dementia in the years to come. I pray for God to help me love her right where she’s at today. Your story encourages me. God bless you and your father!

    • To meet them where they are and cherish those moments is all we can do. They can no longer be “with” us. We have to be with them. Prayers for you and your mother.

  4. I’m traveling this road with my mom. It’s hard, but there are blessings to be found in creating moments of joy in her world. I never related it to how Jesus came to relate to us in our world. Thank you for sharing this. It gives me new perspective.

    Merry Christmas all!

    • It was an ah-ha moment for me to see God’s relationship with me reflected in my relationship with my dad.

  5. I love the line “Jesus met the Samaritan woman right where she was”. Thank you. Having watched a grandfather, mother-in-law, husband and now a dear friend struggle with this, it gives me an understanding of how I can best be with her and treasure time with her. Thank you for sharing this. It is a blessing.

    • What a tough road with this disease you have walked. I’m praying for you as you continue this heartbreaking journey with your friend.

  6. Kim,
    There’s a lot of wisdom here. I can feel your heart for connection both with your dad and with our heavenly father. Your efforts seem fluid as opposed to the rigidity that unfortunately, many of us grew up thinking was necessary for a growing relationship with our Lord. And your reference to the waltz…I’ll tuck that in my pocket and keep my ear down, listening for the notes being played and letting God lead. Thank you for this perspective.
    God bless,
    Kellie, Loganville GA

    • I love your thought of keeping your ear down, listening for the notes to be played. Oh, that our hearts would beat to the same rhythm as our Lord.

  7. Oh Kim this is so beautiful! It is like how things are with my daddy. I hate that we can’t see him as he slips further and further away. I take comfort only in knowing that God is right there with him and one day he will be healed in an instant. Love you friend❤️

  8. Thank you. I cared for a man with dementia earlier this year, and I know what you are saying. I woke up today feeling frazzled about my messy relationship with God because I feel like I have to be perfect all the time, this was needed. bless you!

  9. This is an incredible post. I love the parallel, between God reaching to us, as you reach out to meet your father. I have never read this thought before and it is incredibly beautiful and encouraging. I’d love to repost this on my website. Thank you

  10. Oh Kim – I love you! Your love for your dad and your Heavenly Father is so deeply beautiful and heartfelt. It is a wonderful feeling that God meets us where we are.

  11. Oh Kim – I love you! Your love for your dad and your Heavenly Father is so deeply beautiful and heartfelt. It is a wonderful feeling that God meets us where we are.

  12. I just lost my sweet auntie to Alzheimer’s and then my momma, her twin sister, 8 days later.

    I’m so thankful that God meets us right where we are. We did the same with my auntie as you are doing with your dad.

    Thank you for writing this so beautifully. My heart really needed it this morning as my grief is so very heavy.

    • Kim,

      So sorry sweet sister. Dealing with alzheimer’s is never easy. I dealt with dementia for 10 years both parents. I understand what you went through. Losing two family members so close is super hard. Asking God to give you strength, comfort & peace as you grieve both losses. Sending virtual hugs to you from Watauga TN.

      Blessings 🙂

  13. Oh, Kimberly,
    I knew before I even went to the link that I would be deeply touched. Thank you for the lessons being learned and for sharing this so beautifully.

    And for the record, you will always be Kimberly and you dad will always be Uncle Vince

  14. What incredibly beautiful words and insights you’ve shared here. I am blessed by them and will hold them close today! Thank you, and many blessings as you walk in the tender love of God.

  15. Thank you for this Kim. It’s just what I need today as I face some (hopefully minor) health issues. I hope you have a blessed Christmas and cherish all the small memories with your father..

  16. Thanks for writing this. Glad you’re able to still visit with him. The 14 months my mom lived with us I heard more stories from her past, sweet and hard ones, than I’d ever heard before. Learning to find where she’s at in her memories was very helpful for us. Praying you continue to find joy in this journey.

  17. Kimberly, your words are beautiful. As my Hubs and I walk through health issues with his mom, we are working to meet her where she’s at and to love her well. It’s kind of amazing to consider how God does this with us every single day in every second of the day. I loved what you said about learning to find your father in his memories. Such a beautiful way to describe how you meet with your father. May your Christmas hold moments of connecting with your father.

  18. How absolutely beautiful and insightful. I know tire Dad benefits from your perspective.
    I love the thought that God desires communion with me so much that He chose to come where I was…. not expecting me to rise to His perfection, but joining me in my imperfection. Oh the reckless love of God!

  19. I don’t have my parents anymore and they were gone before dementia set in, but I really loved what you said in the second to last paragraph beginning with “Likewise” and ending with “a love that will never give up on me.” Precious words that my heart will treasure. Thank you, Kim.

  20. Oh Kim!! This is so heartbreaking! I cried as I read your eloquent words. And the way you wove your feelings dealing with your dad into our relationship with Jesus is so very true. Your words are so perfect. I can’t imagine my daddy not knowing who I am would break my every being as I’m sure it does you. I’m so glad I read “your story”. What a way to minister to those going through this same experience. May God continue to give you insight and words that will help many who need to read your words.
    Wishing the Gibbens family a very merry Christmas full of God’s love.
    Thank you again for speaking to my heart. Love you, girl!

  21. Thank you, Kim, for sharing this priceless perspective on the Father’s love for us! What an insight! God bless your family as you “run with endurance the race marked out for you!”

  22. That was a lovely post, Kim. Through the pain of remembering your Dad as he was, and seeing him as he is now, you have – okay, you would insist that God has given you the insight and strength of character to be where your Dad is, so you can still communicate with him.
    God bless,
    Elizabeth.

  23. Your sentiments are beautifully expressed. I lost my mother to advanced dementia a year ago. It was one of the most difficult times of her life and mine – one we endured for almost three years. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your father. It was a comfort reading your thoughts and remembering that God does meet us wherever we are.

  24. Beautiful. How true and how wise you are Kim. Dementia is a difficult road to walk with a loved one; but, you sound as if you have found a good way to connect. God bless both of you.

  25. That is one of the most beautiful stories I’ve ever read. I thank you for sharing. It hit home for me in so many ways. I lost my sister this year to Alzheimer’s, so I know well your journey. My thoughts and prayers are with you. My grateful heart thanks you. With love and hugs and prayers, Patty

  26. This is such a great analogy! I walk a similar journey with Dad who has semantic dementia (frontal temporal dementia). While he remembers who I am, during his “down cycles” he is a completely different person – angry, selfish, horrendous behavior. But then he comes back in the “good cycle”. I cannot imagine what my Heavenly Father experienced when I have my own “down cycle” & become too busy for Him!
    I miss my mother horribly but am so grateful she is not having to watch Dad decline this way. God always has a reason and purpose, and I know for this season of life I am meant to support people walking this journey like you are doing with this article. I help lead a memory care support group at my church and have been blessed to help those walking this journey.
    I will be praying for strength, patience, and understanding as you continue to engage with your Dad.
    Much love from Texas!

  27. Thank you for this. We lost my mom to dementia & I saw God in allot of the details of caring for her despite how frustrating it was. I too was the nice lady who came to see her, no longer her youngest daughter. I never connected the dots so beautifully that Jesus came to us in a similar way. Emmanuel indeed! Bless you & your Dad especially thru this dementia journey. I will pray for more gems like this along the path for you. Merry Christmas!

  28. Beautiful Kim. I can relate to everything you said since I went through it with Larry. There were days when I didn’t think he remembered me or the boys. Our faith kept us strong up until the last few days and I still cherish every day with him and our family. Thanks for the wonderful message at this time of the year.

  29. Thanks for sharing and I emphasize with your relationship now with your dad. I had that with my mom before she passed. She had Alzheimers and lived with us for her last two years. You treasure your time and cling to the little moments when they are there with you and know you even if just briefly.

  30. Kim,

    This post so resonated with me. I dealt with dementia of all phases for 10 years. It is never easy. One thing I learned is the patient needs routine. Mom had it first & was bed ridden for two years. I visited her each Monday after work. When hospice was there I would hear her say “must be Monday around 5. That is my girl coming to visit.” She didn’t recognize the other girls as they lived far away & didn’t visit often. With dad he had to be moved into an assisted living. For him I decided to make a photo album of old photos from his past. It is surprising how well he could remember the good old days & not what he ate for breakfast. Caring for him got hard & I quit a good job to be more available. He had essential tremors (hands shaking all time) so I would often have to feed him. God sent me a message one day. It was lunch time & he was having trouble eating. I asked if I could feed him & he said yes. I did. One of the men on the other side of him said “You will get jewels in your crown for this”. His dementia got so bad he was in geriatric psych hospital twice. It was a hard 10 years. Well worth it. My faith, trust & spiritual muscles were grown immensely.

    Praying for everyone who is dealing with aging parents & their mental health issues. Asking God to give you strength & courage to handle each day & situation. May you realize that God will bless you for your hard work.

    Blessings 🙂