I’m not very good at keeping plants alive. I forget to water them. I leave them in the sun, and sometimes they become parched. I even have a penchant for killing succulents.
That said, I love flowers. Watching them grow and bloom makes my heart swell.
In this time of COVID-19 and sheltering at home for months, I’ve been longing to see more things grow. My heart needs light and color when the world is swirling with disappointment, cancellations, sickness, and racial tension.
A few months ago, I went to a local nursery and picked out two new rosebushes to plant at my house. I walked the aisles and finally chose from among the dozens of varieties.
I’m always drawn like a magnet to the two-toned roses. I picked out two tea rose varieties – one called the “Dark Night,” which promised roses with crimson petals and yellow centers, and the other named “Double Delight,” with velvety white petals that gave way to bright magenta at the edges.
We planted my rosebushes on an overcast day before the heat hit hard. We packed fresh, organic soil around the base of each rosebush and watered them generously. I started a new routine of going out every evening to check on my rose bushes. I felt maternal and nurturing, watering them nightly.
The first week all their leaves and blooms shriveled up and fell to the ground. The second week the stems turned brown as well.
Was I doing something wrong? Watering too much or too little?
I enlisted the help of my mother-in-law, who is the “plant doctor.” She has a knack for reviving any little haggard plant and propagating even the smallest cuttings. She assured me that the rosebushes were okay.
“They’ve just been through trauma,” she said. “Keep watering them. You can’t water roses too much.”
So, I kept watering and wondering.
A week later, my mother-in-law came over again and declared, “We need to prune the rose bushes.” I delivered a set of garden clippers and some gloves and watched her carefully clean off all the dead leaves and trim back all of the branches.
She showed me how the stems were turning green again and the places where new shoots were emerging. I breathed a sigh of relief.
“Keep watering them every day,” she reminded me.
So I did.
The stems looked bare. Thorns poked out in all directions like bad morning hair. There were no blooms in sight. But I held onto hope. I knew my babies had been through shock after being transplanted to a new place with different soil.
Like all of us in this strange season, they needed to be watered. They needed to root in the new soil. They needed extra grace when it came to producing. They needed extra attention until they could be brought back to health and blooming again.
I recently hosted a workshop for women leaders where a few of my friends who are experts spoke about trauma. My friend, Dr. Deshunna Ricks, taught me that we experience trauma in a variety of ways, including direct experience, witnessing an event, hearing about something that’s happened to someone close or a member of one’s race. We can even be harmed by repeated exposure to a traumatic event on social media.
Friend, we all have experienced trauma of some kind in our lives. Even this time of COVID-19 and racial unrest in our country has been traumatic for many of us. As women, many of us are leading, parenting, and ministering to people who also have endured trauma in their lives. Trauma affects the brain and our ability to function. We need to speak life and love to ourselves and others affected by trauma.
My friend Whitney inspired me to look at the story in John 4 of the Samaritan woman, who met Jesus at the well through a new lens. This woman had endured trauma. She had five husbands in a time when women were not allowed to divorce men. She carried the burden of relational trauma and perhaps other kinds of abuse. She was an outsider in her community. Even the disciples questioned Jesus for having a conversation with this Samaritan woman. Men did not talk to women, and Jews did not talk to Samaritans, a people group considered unclean by the Jews.
Jesus went to the well with the purpose of healing this woman and revealing Himself as the Messiah.
He tells the woman, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life”
John 4:13 (NLT)
Jesus spoke to her about a living water that runs like a spring and nourishes, heals, and brings eternal life. This water differed from the water that came from a well. Jesus declared that He was the Messiah who brings new life.
The woman was transformed by her encounter with Jesus. She was used by God in her healing and granted the privilege of declaring her testimony to her community. Like the Samaritan woman, we need to be nourished by God’s Living Water, which brings us to flourishing.
Last week, I stepped outside and squealed with wonder when I saw a flash of crimson. Layers upon layers of velvet petals cupped that one glorious bloom. My first “Dark Night” rose embraced the daylight and declared that she, too, had been transformed by the Master Gardener.
Like my rosebush, we need nourishment after trauma. We need to be patient with the healing process. We need to speak love to ourselves and others. We need to trust the Master Gardener is rooting us anew and shaping His roses for the future.
Dorina has written more on how God has designed each of us to flourish for His glory in her Bible study, Flourishing Together: Cultivating a Fruitful Life in Christ. Details here.
[bctt tweet=”As we deal with the trauma in our lives, we need to be nourished by God’s Living Water, which brings us to flourishing. -@DorinaGilmore:” username=”incourage”]
Leave a Comment
Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Dorina,
I, like your rose bushes, have been living in a dry, parched, and barren land. God has been pruning me in the process, but He has been pouring out His living water on me through His holy word. My heart, like the deer, has been panting for streams of cool refreshing water. In order to pour out, I need to be poured into. I love the scripture as Jesus meets the woman at the well and He tells her that if she drinks from His well (His Word) she will never be thirsty again and it will bubble up like springs of eternal life within her. Even on my laptop, I’ve been drawn to photographs depicting water. My head has been listening to what my soul is craving. I believe that’s why I was led to write this post: https://walkingwellwithgod.blogspot.com/2020/07/panting-for-streams-of-water.html I sure need to be sending out my roots along the stream of life. Your post on healing keeps pointing me back to the truth that you can never be over-watered!
Blessings,
Bev xx
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
I love your connection to the deer panting for water. I am on a journey too – learning about my own trauma and listening to the needs of my body and soul!
Angie says
Perfect. Thank you so much. Be patient. Speak love. That is what Jesus would do.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
YES! I am constantly returning to His example!
Patricia Raybon says
Oh, I love this, Dorina. It reminds me that, after trauma, to treat and nourish myself kindly — and also offer the same for others in trauma recovery. Your rose illustration, meantime, provides just the right visual picture to explain your point. Thanks for sharing your wisdom with such beauty and helpful love. With warmest thanks!
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
Patricia, your encouragement is always water to my soul. Praying for all of us as we are on this trauma recovery journey. May we continue to return to the Source who never runs out of living water for us! For His glory!
Irene says
Dorina, this post is surely heaven sent! What a lovely comparison! May you be nurtured well by the Master Gardener and those close to you, dear one.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
Thank you, Irene! I love how God speaks to us through nature and the flowers! Blessings to you!
Sandy says
Beautiful. As many of us try to negotiate these chaotic times we forget our own need for water. We need to make a conscious effort to make time to settle into a place where we can receive the wonderful nurturing water of our Father. Thank you for reminding me to go to my place every day.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
Yes, I am trying to remember to take those long drinks of the Living Water instead of settling for a quick sip at the drinking fountain. God be with you in your place!
Theresa Boedeker says
Beautiful. God really is the Great healer. And roses help too. I know when I was recovering from some life stopping trauma, my husband dug me a huge garden bed and I ordered 40 roses. I knew nothing about gardening. But carrying for those roses and tending them day in and out really helped me heal from my trauma. And in that garden it was just God and I and I was able to pray and process things. Love and mercy filled my soul. Roses and God really can heal trauma.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
It’s true! I don’t boast any gardening knowledge but I’m learning the simple art of tending to these rose bushes and the delight of watching them bloom even through extreme heat. So much to learn as I want them flourish.
M @ In Beautiful Chaos says
Beautiful reminder! Isn’t it amazing how often we can see parallels of our own lives in nature! Just another reminder that the God who made the universe also made (and most importantly, *cares* about us!).
Blessings,
M @ In Beautiful Chaos
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
It’s so true, M! I love chasing God’s glory through nature. He always reaches out to me in such a personal way through Creation.
Dawn Ferguson-Little says
How does the Rose get to be a Rose. It pushes through the thorns. To get to top. It roots stay firmly rooted to the group or the pot it planted into. It drinks that fresh water it is given. Also pushes up towards the sunshine. It lets nothing stop it until it becomes that beautiful Rose. But our lives are like a Rose at times. We have push through the thorns our thrones can be the problems we have in life that the old Devil wants us to hold on to. The Devil wants to whisper in our ears if we let him. You will never get past this problem. No one can help you get over it or take it away or make it better. But you can get better you can get over your problem. You can go to Jesus and drink from the well of life let him water you with his living water. Stay rooted firmly in Jesus with your roots in the soil of life rooted in the word the Bible and Prayer. Then you will be strong enough not to let the Devil whisper in your ear you will never get past this problem it yours. You can say no Devil I going to grow and develop into the beautiful Rose God wants me to be. See God help through his Holy Spirit to know how to get help with this problem. Then you can say back to the Devil I keeping my roots in the soil of life which is the word the Bible Jesus is watering me so I don’t go thirsty. So I can bloom into a beautiful Rose and by pass the Devil’s nasty thorns. For all to see Jesus shinning in me. Love today’s reading xx
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
Thank you, Dawn. I love the way God meets us in the flowers and fauna and all of Creation to preach about redemption.
Beth Williams says
Dorina,
Everyone will experience trauma at some point in their lives. We all have our desert wandering times as well. God uses those circumstances to bring us closer to Him. He slows us down long enough to realize we need His living water to nourish our souls. This year has been a long season of aloneness, fear & unrest. Our souls are yearning for loving arms to hug & hands to hold. Our souls & bodies need tending just like flowers. We need water & sunshine. Psalm 1 gives a great visual. Blessed is the man who delights in God’s law & meditates on it day & night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers. Take time to care for your souls-filling them up with the life giving water so they can flourish.
Blessings 🙂
Dorina Lazo Gilmore says
Thanks for sharing, Beth. Your words echo one of my favorite passages in scripture about flourishing!