She was standing in front of the bouquets of flowers, with a shopping basket in one hand, purse slung across her shoulder, and her hair tired from a long day at the office. It was rush hour, when women from all walks of life intersected at Trader Joe’s to pick up food for dinner.
“Hard to decide what to pick, huh?” I turned to smile, standing next to her.
“Yeah,” she answered with a chuckle, probably to be polite. She wore a cool pair of spectacles and a cute wrinkle in her nose when she smiled.
“What are you deciding between?” I asked.
My new friend told me she’s not sure. She said she’ll often stand there, unable to choose. Then, she’ll go home with her groceries, without any flowers.
“That used to happen to me all the time, ” I said. “I wouldn’t be able decide between the flowers I really wanted and the ones that cost less . . . ”
“YES! Exactly!” my bespectacled friend interjected. She turned to me now with recognition. We were of the same tribe. Women who were unable to bring flowers home to enjoy.
“I’d talk myself out of it,” I confided. “I’d say, It’s not worth it. They’ll only last a few days. I later realized what I was actually saying was, I am not worth it. What I find joy in for a few days isn’t worth it.”
“So true,” my friend nodded with wide-eyed agreement.
I asked her if there were flowers she’d loved as a little girl, if there were flowers she liked more as she grew up.
This stranger-become-kindred-spirit started sharing stories about why sunflowers made her happy. They reminded her of summer and riding her bike with a white basket adorned with a plastic sunflower. But lately, she was drawn to hydrangeas because they were soothing.
“Your stories are special,” I said. “There’s something about flowers. About how God made them. How God made us. I read that scientific studies show simply looking at flowers improves emotional health.”
“Really?!” My friend was intrigued.
“A Harvard study even showed that women who had the morning-blahs, who usually didn’t buy flowers, experienced a boost in energy and their moods lifted, lasting throughout the day, by seeing flowers in the kitchen first thing in the morning.”
“How do you know all this?” she asked.
I told her I had lost my spark a few years ago. I had been good at taking care of others and getting things done. But I hadn’t been good at nurturing my own heart or taking care of my well-being. So I became overwhelmed with stress, even though I was good at working hard, pleasing others, surviving, and pushing through. But in my honest moments, I longed to find my spark again: to experience God’s peace and joy in a fresh, intimate way.
Women are heroes when it comes to loving and caring for others. But why is it so hard to give ourselves permission to rest and refresh, when we’re stressed and need it most?
My friend began to share. I listened.
“You are worth it,” I told her, as I looked in her eyes, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. “You are worth taking care of.”
Deep inside us, God created an inner spirit that needs nurturing. We were made to be loved, cared for, and given attention. We all need permission to take better care of ourselves. We all need a friend to help us remember we are like beautiful flowers blossoming in the fields.
As we picked out our flowers, I invited her to connect with me online. I told her I’m an author leading a community of women like us: kindred spirits on the journey to nurture our soul and find our spark again. As we said goodbye, I whispered, Thank You, God.
Soul Care Tip: Buy flowers for yourself. Behavioral research at Rutgers University found that simply looking at flowers improves emotional health, so get some for yourself. May the flowers remind you how valuable you are to Jesus. He is your peace.
On every page in You’re Worth Loving: 40 Days of Rest and Soul Care Guide, Bonnie guides you to take better care of yourself. For extra resources to refresh your soul, Bonnie created a new soul care package that includes the beautiful 40-day soul care guide ebook called “You’re Worth Loving,” 6 soul care teaching videos, 6 prayer podcasts, Scripture coloring pages, and access to a self-paced online book club! Click here to get the Whispers of Rest soul care resources package for yourself and for someone to encourage!
We would love to encourage you to nurture your heart with God, so we’re choosing FIVE winners to receive Bonnie’s soul care package! Comment below with your favorite way to take better care of yourself for your chance to win!
[bctt tweet=”Rest in your loving Savior’s arms. Be kind to yourself and rest. You are worth taking care of. -@thebonniegray:” username=”incourage”]
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Come to me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 (NIV)
God doesn’t want us to do more for Him. He longs to take care of us and whisper words of love and peace. Instead of layering on guilt when you feel stressed, let God love you by getting some tender love and care. Rest in your loving Savior’s arms. Be kind to yourself and rest. You are worth taking care of.Soul Care Tip: Buy flowers for yourself. Behavioral research at Rutgers University found that simply looking at flowers improves emotional health, so get some for yourself. May the flowers remind you how valuable you are to Jesus. He is your peace.
A Prayer for Today:
Dear Jesus, Give me courage to choose beauty that comes from nurturing the true me. Like waves returning the sand, have Your way in me. Help me step away. I choose to be beloved, not busy, today. Amen.
On every page in You’re Worth Loving: 40 Days of Rest and Soul Care Guide, Bonnie guides you to take better care of yourself. For extra resources to refresh your soul, Bonnie created a new soul care package that includes the beautiful 40-day soul care guide ebook called “You’re Worth Loving,” 6 soul care teaching videos, 6 prayer podcasts, Scripture coloring pages, and access to a self-paced online book club! Click here to get the Whispers of Rest soul care resources package for yourself and for someone to encourage!
We would love to encourage you to nurture your heart with God, so we’re choosing FIVE winners to receive Bonnie’s soul care package! Comment below with your favorite way to take better care of yourself for your chance to win!
[bctt tweet=”Rest in your loving Savior’s arms. Be kind to yourself and rest. You are worth taking care of. -@thebonniegray:” username=”incourage”]
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Bonnie,
Your book, “Whispers of Rest” has been on my end table for awhile. I just read day 10 entitled “Choose Quiet Love.” In it you talked about taking the challenge of buying yourself flowers because I’m worthy and it’s good for my emotional health. Now, I’m reading this today. I REALLY think I need to go to Trader Joe’s, not him and haw, over the $9.99 to get the larger bouquet. Taking good care of myself doesn’t come naturally, but to deny myself healthy soul care and self care is to demean God’s beautiful creation – me. Thanks for a beautiful reminder this am. You are helping God’s message, and His love, to break through.
Blessings,
Bev xx
I love just going to a coffee house to read. I get two of my favorite things at once. Coffee and books!
I also try to get up before my kids every morning for the same reason!
Such a beautiful story! Thanks for sharing!
I love picking out flowers for myself, your devotional hit home to me, because I will past up the more expensive ones, but wash flower God creative shows beauty and that were all his, one of kind masterpiece.
Bonnie,
This post was straight from God! I have spent my adult years taking care of everyone else and their needs that now I am not even sure what mine are! My massage therapist told me last night that I need to start taking care of myself. Your post was almost word for word what she told me so I know God is speaking to me! Thank you for these words. They are words I need to take to heart . To remember that I am worth more than what I think I am. To know that God is teaching me the value of self care. Thank you, Bonnie , for being sensitive to the voice of our Lord.
Thanks for reminding me, us, we are worthy of the simple things like flowers. I also love to buy flowers for myself. But with 2 cats who also love to investigate flowers and any pretty thing, I always take the flowers to my dad’s house and then we can both enjoy them. I started my own flower garden a few years ago so I can enjoy the flowers when I’m outside or from my windows. But it’s winter time and so I watch for the little green stems of spring flowers. The joy is in the waiting that reminds me, everything good in God’s time.
Ah! I know it may sound strange, but God has totally been using sunflowers this last month or two as a reassurance that I’m on the right path about a career choice (I’m a ridiculously late-bloomer in figuring it out). And there they were again! Thank you so much for this post. 🙂
This is why I love spring when the beautiful colors of flowers come back into our world. They are a simple pleasure that do much for our well being. Thank you for the reminder that we need to take care of ourselves and that it is when we allow ourselves to rest that we find our way again and new strength.
Thank you for the reminder that each of us is worth taking care of – that I am worth it. I love to take a long bubble bath while reading a book.
I like to find a quite nice corner at a coffee shop, having my favorite coffee, listening to music that help me meditate God’s word, His love and His promise, music that lift up my spirit. May be I will read a few chapters of the Bible or a spiritual book. And journal of all the thought that come s as long. I also like to have fresh beautiful flowers on my table. And may be light up a scented candle and playing some spiritual songs, and keep counting all the blessings that God had lay on me. I also like to get an inexpensive journal book with bible verses on every page for me to drop down every opportunity that I encounter with my Lord. And I need to say back to Him thankfully:”Heavenly Father, I am preciously and honored in His eyes”.
loved the wrote up ! found it interesting how she talked with you too. in the city I live in no one would carry a conversation or respond to someone trying to strike one up. they simply walk away !!
mom’s and women need to refresh in their lives weekly to stay happy and healthy. I’m a stay at home mom who homeschools two grades per day so I know one must care for themselves. praying other women find that one thing that helps them carry on too.
I read that in the 30s women would still buy lipstick while other items weren’t available due to war…interesting they still reached out to care abit for themselves.
One of my favorite ways to take care of myself is to just give myself some time to enjoy a nice hot cup of tea and read my Bible or book. Every once in awhile I will go get a nice pedicure and manicure. Like the flowers, I usually talk my way out of the nice manicure and pedicure… convincing myself there is a better way I could use the money. Thank you for this encouraging word today. I needed it. I’m worth it.
This is so perfect! Part of me wants to say, “Thank you for giving me an excuse to buy flowers!” but then… doesn’t that prove your point? We shouldn’t NEED an excuse to do something that nurtures our hearts, bodies, or souls.
Last night, my husband insisted on buying me some new shirts. I had 2 in mind, and he insisted on 3. As we walked out, I couldn’t stop myself from apologizing and feeling guilty for needing them. There’s something DEEP there that God needs to redeem. Maybe flowers is a start. ❤️ I also think I should probably get this book!
Thank you so much for writing about this topic. I relate in so many ways, and I too need the permission to take care of myself and to go ahead and love the “pretty” things. I take time with the Father in the morning and place “pretty” essential oils in my diffuser as flowers are hard to find in my city. Reminding myself that the oils are also gift the He gave us. Then continue reading books on my lunch break outside in the back of my car with the fresh air surrounding me to remind me of His grace and mercy.
I am intentional about meeting up with friends for coffee, dinner or even just to walk through the grocery together! It is so important and it doesn’t always happen naturally. Often, it takes several texts, calls and even a cancellation or two before we actually sit down and connect our hearts together. EVERY TIME I am blessed, encouraged, challenged and inspired by the women that God has allowed to cross my path and walk this earthly journey. It’s so important to have friends and to be a friend!
Yes! I USED to buy flowers about once a month to put on the table just because they made ME feel happy. In recent years, though, I have stopped, because it became an “unnecessary” expense. Thank you, Bonnie, for reminding me that is a “necessary” expense for my emotional health. Maybe I can’t buy as often as I’d like, but I can certainly budget for it occasionally! Nurturing ourselves is something we women need to do……..
As a single mother, I don’t really make self care a priority even though I know that I need to. My one non negotiable, however, is my coffee and devotionals. PBS might be on in the background, and I might be interrupted a thousand times because my toddler needs something, but I don’t miss the time.
Dear Bonnie, Flowers ( cut, planted or wildflowers) make a world of difference to me, but I never bought them for all the reasons you shared! Today, I nurture myself with long walks outside to rest andcrestire my soul and spirit. But I also get a massage once a month, just to allow someone else to “care for me” and be pampered.
The massage revitalize my body parts that take on the most work and get the least attention!. It’s gift of the essential and personalized human touch. Although a massage used to serm extravagant and expensive, I know the physical and mental benefits far outweigh the cost. It’s a gift to myself!
I love this! I love all of Bonnie’s writings. She gets me. This one describes me to a tee. Guess it’s not just me. Spending my life working so hard to care for others, but running on empty lately and needing a dose of joy in my life.
Thanks for the flowers and a little sunshine this morning. ☀️
Beautiful, small and usually unexpensive things make me smile. A beautiful notebook, a cup, plants, flowers. Beautiful post Bonnie, your words were very liberating for me. Now I don’t feel guilty and I understand the purpose of filling our lifes with beauty.
Wow! True.
I often do the same as I look at flowers, think about it and decide that I don’t need them. This is such an eye-opener. I am guilty of the same. I love taking care of others, but I’m last on the list. I wrote about this a few months ago,
I love hot baths with nice fragrant oils to soak in, I love reading and quiet time. I love just sitting outdoors on a sunny day and fishing up the fun, the that God created. While listening to the birds and air blowing.
I would love this book.
Guilty. Guilty of not taking care of myself more than I’d like to admit. Taking time out to paint my own nails (because I cant afford to have them professionally done) is something I’ve always loved and feel better afterwards. Think I’ll do that today.
Bonnie I can relate in so many ways, but especially the feeling of guilt that washes over me in those times. Am I being a good steward of my finances, do I really need this etc etc. So true how something so little can impact our outlook on the day, such as the beauty of a bouquet. Mostly I’m inspired by your intentionally seeking out others to remind them they are treasured by our Father!
Interesting. I need to look into this, I am taking care of my mom who had a major stroke and will be 86 soon. She is a challenge but a privilege. Some days totally crazy. Like having a five year old at times. Totally no time for myself and exhausting
Thank You, Bonnie, for reminding me and all those who read your post this morning that we are ‘worth it’. As a wife, mother and grandmother, I find myself going out of my way for others but not for myself. I love to garden and can’t even count the number of times I have ‘talked myself out of’ buying the plant I really wanted because it cost a little more than the variety I settled on. I would buy the more expensive plant for someone else before I would buy it for me. Your post about the flowers really hit a note with me this morning. My beautiful daughter is home with the flu and I was going to buy some flowers for her this morning because I know it would put a smile on her face and in her heart;
but, I too love flowers, and wouldn’t consider buying myself a bouquet. I call myself frugal (cheap), but maybe it is somehow deeper that I don’t feel I deserve it. It is not just with plants or bouquets………..I’d buy anything for someone else, just not myself. Money is not the issue. Your post has given me something to look deep inside about.
Good Morning,
I, too, love perusing through the flower department just to soak in the beauty. Now I know why! I may just have to actually buy some the next time I’m there. 🙂
As a workaholic in a busy career, I had to learn the value of self/soul care the hard way. I had to go through some health scares to fully realize it’s importance.
All my life I’d been told TO take care of myself but I never really knew HOW to do that.
Thank you for the reminder to take care of ourselves so we can, in turn, serve those around us better.
xoxo,
Belle
My favorite way to care for myself is to have my quiet time every morning. I have a little sanctuary in my home, in the quietest corner. I have soft lighting and candles. I take at least an hour to think and read and pray. I try to focus on good things and not much news or politics. I read the (in) courage devotionals and a few others. I write encouraging emails to people I think need an encouraging word. This Bible study sounds like something I’d like.
I just bought a small pot of mini daffodils at Publix to set on my kitchen bar area! I don’t have a Trader Joe’s yet!! That bright spot of yellow enlivens my day when I see it and puts a happy feeling over me. It’s amazing such a small and simple thing of beauty brings joy! ❤️ There’s plenty in my life to fret over and figure out – it’s a small oasis of sorts…
I’m not sure I even know how to nurture myself….I’ve been struggling with deep grief and sadness and lack of self care has started to catch up with me now that I am in my early 50’s. I think I need to read this book 🙂
I live alone, so I often feel uncared about. Thank you for this post.
I have found completing simple “I want” statements revolutionary. Like I want —- for lunch, or to do this – for 15 minutes. Naming something that makes me happy, then doing it, is a big deal for me.
Here I was feeling guilty for having purchased myself a $10 bouquet last month, wishing I had put that money toward something more lasting, when this post popped up. Thank you for helping me remember how happy it made me to see those flowers every morning for almost three weeks. The label said “long lasting” and they actually were! I think I’ll buy myself some more to last through Valentine’s Day.
Dear Bonnie,
I read your book, Whispers of Rest, after resigning from my reporter position at the local newspaper after two very hard years. I moved for this position, too! It was a hard time in my life and I realized I didn’t know who I was outside of that position and it was gone! Who was I? I quietly left not to cause unrest to my sources. So painful but needed at the time. The paper was just bought out and people were leaving left and right. I tried to stay but couldn’t. Now I’m in a loving work environment and am serving by teaching children weekly! Something I would’ve never volunteered for if not asked to do so first. It’s been a lot of hard work. Enjoyable work. Some weeks are so hard, I don’t want to go back. Last night, we implemented a new strategy and we had our best night! I am learning that once I weed things out of my life, I am constantly replacing it with something else. So guess what? Almost three years later after that really dark time in my life, I am STILL learning to rest. Another study I’m involved with is wrapping up and we’ve been encouraged to pray what we will do next. My answer is nothing. I’m going to focus on teaching the kids well these last three months of class for the other evening of the week, which also involves other mornings of meetings and trainings. We’ve been going strong since September and then we will break for summer in the May. I didn’t know you had this resource available. I will definitely have to check it out! Thanks for your ministry. That time three years ago was probably my darkest time aside from my divorce. You kept me going. Literally.
Thanks again, Bonnie, for this gentle and loving reminder that it’s OK to care for ourselves. I have participated in some of your soul care challenges and really enjoyed them. The flower idea you shared there must have stuck in my head, as recently I’ve been buying flowers every couple of weeks and placing them on our kitchen center island, in a beautiful, vintage-looking pitcher I bought a couple of years ago.
It sometimes feels “wasteful”, and I understand those who truly cannot afford them, but it sure is special when we can have them. It brings some fresh life, especially to our New England winter. I often do pick the “cheaper” carnations because they sometimes smell nice (many flowers have the smell bred out of them) and do last longest. In the fall I got several beautiful bouquets of mums that were so pretty and lasted forever! So a cheaper option can still be nice. Once long ago when funds were short, my husband went and picked me wildflowers, placing them in a clear glass vase/jar with some blue food coloring. It was touching and memorable…and free.
I recently read something someone said online, that we usually state that self-care helps us to be strong for others, but that it’s OK to care for ourselves simply because we’re worth it. I think both ideas are good and true, and can provide balance. We do want to be healthy and strong to care for those around us and do our responsibilities well, but I also believe that we are worth caring for just because God created and loves us. <3
I am not very good at self care. It’s one of the things my counselor keeps on me about working on. I think I’m going to order this book today to help me!
I was told by my doctors in September that I could no longer work and I had to make the decision to quit my job after working for close to 40 years of my life. This devotional hit home to me. Come to me all who are burden and heavy layden and I will give you rest a verse along with the rest of it something that I have after almost 40 years of My life of pushing myself and now I have to slow down it has given me time to get into the word of God and read and study and praise his name which I am very grateful. I would love to win your book as Ivam unable to purchase it at the moment
God bless you
Leigh Ann
This is beautiful! I’m printing it out in a larger font and this afternoon will take it to my MIL (85) with a mylar balloon with flowers printed. She actually doesn’t like getting flowers but she loves balloons!! We’ve all had a hard year…
I’ll get flowers for me later. For now, I have a huge pot of orchids blooming for 5 weeks! At one point there were 32 blooms!
Finding worth in myself has been hard. My husband died December of 2018, my father died 6 months afterward. My daughter lives in another country and has no time for me. My family never call me. So, I go to the grocery store every other week and I buy flowers for myself. People ask me “who are they for?’ I say, from me to me! I do have a good church family who love me. That is God’s gift to me. I know He loves me.
I had to stop reading when you said you felt that you weren’t worth it to buy yourself the flowers because I cried. Just this past week with 4 children in tow I stopped in front of the flowers examining all of them & picked up my favorite bouquet. I smelled them, smiled & put them back. My daughter even asked who I was buying them for. I never came home with the flowers. Lately giving & doing for my children & spouse has left me feeling empty, resentful & bitter. I have nothing else to give. My husband even mentioned this morning that I wasn’t meeting his needs intimately. I have nothing else to give. I need God’s help, but finding the time to connect with him seems impossible. So in saying all this I think taking time for a hot bath would help me care for myself better. Thank you for writing this article. I needed this & to be reminded I’m not the only one who feels this way.
Thank you Bonnie for this beautiful reminder that we should take care of ourselves. I have recently started buying flowers for myself because I like flowers and I always wanted my husband to bring me flowers as a surprise but it never happened and I would be disappointed so I decided not to wait and start treating myself
However, there are still things that I am hesitant to buy for myself but if it is for my children then I wouldn’t think twice.
I am on a journey of self love and self discovery as i have lost myself in being a wife and mother. A friend reminded me this week that God delights in me. I need to remember that and take care of myself.
I love the permission to take the time and energy to do simple enjoyable things for ourselves. I am worth that. This spoke so dearly to my heart during a season of intense health and moving. I’ve been intentional about resting when I can but this take it a step further to enjoyment and caring for myself. What a gift from the Lord to read this today ♥️
I absolutely love this! Though I don’t often buy full priced flowers our local grocery store reduces them and those, those I will buy and use to brighten my work space, because?…. because it’s okay to buy myself flowers! I doubt I have the money to purchase your resources, but I do live adult coloring and try to practice self nurturing! Bless you!!!
I work full time at a job, also work full time in my church in many ministries, I love being a servant and I take care of my elderly mother. Some moments it feels like I just can not do another thing, but Jesus sweeps in and offers refreshment through a song or the word. I would be wonderful to really be able to do some self care for myself and not feel guilty.
Bonnie,
Loved your book Whispers of Rest. I’ve been following you on your journey. Thank you for telling women to care for themselves. It seems we get so busy caring for others that we don’t take the time or want to spend the money on ourselves. We think it’s a waste. Truth is we need our tanks filled up just like everyone else otherwise we get depleted then we won’t have the energy or be in the right mood to care for others. God says we are His special creation. Not caring for ourselves sends an insult to God that we aren’t of any value. He values us women so much that He died for us on a cruel cross. I have enjoyed your writings & often quote your books. Praying more women go out & buy some flowers or treat themselves to something nice. We deserve it!!
Blessings 🙂
So right on point to what I needed to read today! I have been taking care of my loved ones and I am so depleted. I loved reading this article, and love how women help one another, even strangers who add a little encouragement into another’s life because it makes all the difference some days. Today I was the recipient of that, even if it came in little moments though I longed for longer minutes of it, I fully grasped them, that is how needy I saw myself today. How stressed I’ve been. I love spending time with God. Talking to Him. Singing praises. Worshipping. I’ve been doing this alot lately, and it invigorates me and refills me with joy. It rejuvenates me. God knows me intimately, and always points me to see things that pick-me-up and change my outlook. Even if but for the moment, every bit of joy received from Him goes a long way to mend my tattered and worn out soul, remembering in gratitude all of the good things He gives to me in my life. I’ve let gratitude slide, and I can see the difference in my life.
I like to spend time alone reading, God’s words, or something else. If i happen to fall asleep, the better. Sleep doesn’t come easy, but when it comes naturally, not from alarm clock to alarm clock, it is so refreshing and nourishing. A new spark of energy to start the next phase of the day. To me, this is a blessing from God.
I’m buried so deep in depression & trauma that I no longer know what brings me joy or makes me feel loved. I do know that the heavy voice of shame in my head keeps me from believing that I am allowed to enjoy anything. I’m going to try new things & see if I can figure out what caring for myself looks/feels like.
I’ve been guilty of trying to win that “busy award” for 30 years. In the past 18 months, God has shown me it doesn’t exist. He’s teaching me to carve out quiet time for me by saying “no” without feeling like I have to explain. Thank you for the encouragement!
For my self care I rise early, read devotionals, scripture, journal and pray. I take an hour long walk daily, in the evening when time and weather permit. I plant flowers in the spring… now I’m going to add- buy flowers.. thank you Bonnie for this beautiful reflection!!!
These words of wisdom made me stop and think. I thought it would be easy to write all about how I take care of myself. I thought all day about this. Surely there must be something! My eyes were opened wide when I couldn’t think of anything that I specifically do to care for myself. I realize now that I must. Each day will be an adventure for me as I pray and ask the Lord to lead, guide and direct me in this.
Thank you for opening my eyes!
This was exactly what I needed to read this morning. Thank you for sharing the gift of your words. In what has been an incredibly busy and sometimes long and difficult season in my life, I have been trying to remember that I need to take care of myself as well as I take care of everyone and everything else. I would love to read your book, Bonnie. One way that I take care of myself is by taking time to read.
Pausing for nature walks, looking at sunsets, listening to creeks, enjoying gardens. ( I hope to have one again.) I’m listening to the rain from my comfy chair & I am thankful.
I sit in adoration at my local parish and let that quiet red light remind me of Who is with me, providing peace in my environment, then my heart, and eventually my soul, even when I’m so restless I can hardly bear it.
Wow…just wow. I do the same thing when it comes to buying flowers in the grocery store and didn’t even realize it until reading this. Tomorrow’s grocery day. And I plan to make sure that somewhere next to the bell peppers there’ll be a bouquet of flowers just for me.
Taking time at my sewing machine when I can loose track of time and just be in the moment.
I like to take care of myself by drinking coffee from a favorite mug in the mornings. I also listen to Christian radio on my drive to and from work. I feel like that prepares my heart to minister to my colleagues and students, and it nourishes my soul after hard days at school.
My favorite way to take better care of myself is to have quiet times in nature with God where I can walk, sit quietly, read the Bible, and look at and enjoy nature.
I recently started exercising and eating healthier . My self esteem is improving . I’m realizing how important it is for me to carve out “me” time . You can’t pour from an empty cup , so I’m making sure mine is not empty .
Wow . . . Bonnie! Loved hearing about your encounter with a woman at Trader Joes and how you were there for her spiritually, emotionally and physically when she didn’t even know she needed you. God is so good in placing us where we are needed and you responded to the need. Flowers? Yes, I am looking forward to buying some flowers. I will admit that I skipped doing that in Whispers Of Rest when we studied it together. The book is in my “comfort box” along with my journal and easily accessible. It brings me back to God, His rest and His peace. Thank you for sharing your life, love, and support with us. ❤️
I like to take time to be still with God every day by reading my Bible. It has become my favorite part of the day!
I’ve always struggled to take the same care of me as I do for others. But about a year ago, began I scheduling regular pedi appointments, taking quiet time to sip my favorite tea, read for pleasure, write notes to friends and savor the quiet moments on the farm. (After a recent cancer diagnosis, I realized how important it is for me to slow down and pour into me so that I can be around for my family as long as I am able. )
Coffee with friends; bubble bath and a good novel.
Thank you for this. I love Bonnie’s books especially Whispers of Rest (been through it at least 3 times and often simply flip it open just for a sweet word of encouragement).
Journaling- sometimes with a nearby candle, often with a cup of tea- is my go-to Self-Care routine. I can get all the rocks out of my soul, without hitting anyone with them, and then I’m able to hear from Jesus. Interestingly, He usually reminds me of His love for me. How is THAT for “care”?!!
Thanks again for posting this! I’m looking for to seeing Bonnie’s new resources. I know they will be wonderful!
Thank you for reminding us we are worth caring for ourselves! I like to purchase flowers for myself, get lost in a good book, the occasional deep tissue massage and Pilates are some of my favorite ways to care for myself.
Still learning how to take better care of myself. One thing I love to do is go to the beach and listen to the waves. Would love to win this prize as it would help me on this journey.
The centering prayer has been huge for me lately. But the biggest one would be just relaxing and working on art with Jesus.
The centering prayer has been huge for me lately. But the biggest one is just relaxing and drawing with Jesus.
Bonnie,
I love what you shared and have found myself doing that exact thing with the flowers at Trader Joe’s! This 40 days sounds amazing and like something I truly need right now. Almost 2 years ago I was told after 16 yrs that I was no longer a fit in my church staff position. Pretty sure it was due to my age. I was devastated and deeply hurt by those I thought were my church family. I devoted 16 yrs to giving and serving there. I have felt unworthy, useless and of little value since that day. I was depressed for a long time. I haven’t been able to find another job to replace my income and that has been hard. I am finally beginning to recover from this hurt and church trauma. Maybe this study with you would help my healing process. I have always enjoyed your authenticity and stories. God bless you,
Lansing Molzen
I like to chill with a favourite author in winter. In summer I like to take a walk by the marina. Both give me soul rest. ❤️
I love taking a day to make homemade bread. I love the feel of kneading the dough, then letting it rise, punch it down and rise again. It reminds me of the days when my kids were young and I would make the family bread and caramel rolls. The boys loved coming home from school to that glorious bread baking in the oven aroma and then sitting at the counter with a huge sticky bun to fill their tummies. So now that they are grown I have decided to relive that experience once a month. I savor the work of creating, the anticipation of the final result and then the moment when I grab a cup of tea, slather butter on a slice of bread, turn on some music and relax after a long productive day in the kitchen. Maybe next time I will put a bouquet of flowers on the table to enjoy while the butter melts on my warm bread and my cinnamon tea is all steamy in my favorite mug. Maybe I will even throw caution to the wind and actually take a quick lick of that melting butter that finds it way rolling down my arm!
First, I LOVE the books. Both have been life changing. I am still working through Whispers of Rest, very slowly to take it in and hear what God wants to teach me. Second, I have learned since starting Whispers of Rest that baths and music for me are game changers so I have been trying to incorporate both of those more in to my life
I play inspirational music and spend a little time alone with God, journaling or walking.
One of the things I started doing for my mental health is going for a brisk walk every evening after work. Getting outside gives my mood a boost and the walking helps me burn off my stress from the work day. It’s been a huge help to me!
You know I love your books. Tonight I clicked on the link in your insta profile to register to win and found this post. Oh your words for this and flowers….
I will start Whispers of Rest again this Lent. Last year (during Lent) I read it for the first time while my youngest daughter was in Cambodia. Some sweet girls there (who had been rescued from trafficking) gave her yellow flowers and that day here I found yellow flowers along our road…. on my morning walk and came in and read your words about flowers!!! God connects the dots!!
I love listening to the music that I enjoy instead of my children’s music choices.
Things that give my soul rest and help me take care of myself are reading and listening to worship music. When I listen to worship music it helps me focus on God instead of my situation, which gives my heart and soul peace and joy that I wouldn’t have without worshipping.
As a mother, it has always been hard to do things to take care of my needs. The needs of others always come first. Recently, I was shopping for groceries and looking for our usual groceries I saw a few things that appealed to me around the store. I made the rounds of the store and was headed to the register walking right past the adorable succulents in cute pots… the beautiful cut flowers in bunches of all sizes… the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups for 88 cents for a pack of two… Blueberry swirl bread … my favorite tea. All things that are not terribly expensive. I will buy specialty coffees for friends and family, flowers for them, their special flavors of ice cream… and yet… simple gifts to nurture myself in small ways makes me feel guilty. Buying clothing I need makes me feel guilty as if I am not worthy of even things that are needed. I don’t know why that is… but I do. While I believe we are supposed to be wise stewards of all that God gives to us, perhaps being kind to ourselves is part of that. We cannot pour from an empty cup as Shirley Dobson said several years ago… and I think she is right. So maybe this week I will pick up some flowers for me while I am buying groceries for everyone else; and not feel guilty about it.
Thank you Bonnie for sharing this message. I know we women forget to take care of our self and always saying that our needs can wait. So many losses within 5 years and I know my mental self is weary. Last weekend we just laid my mom to rest and I haven’t even had time to truly mourn. I keep telling myself that I need to keep busy and not allow my emotions to overwhelm me. So thank you for this needed message to remind me that it is okay to rest and take care of me.
That has been my lifelong heart cry as well, Bonnie, that endless need to be loved.
Blessings, Carol
This is so beautiful! Buying flowers for myself is one of my favorite ways to take care of myself! I loved whispers of rest! I can’t wait to read this one!
I needed this today. I am always taking care of everyone but myself and somedays I just need someone to care for me too. Thank you for all your inspiration to help others.
Bonnie,
What a beautiful restorative message. I recently broke my foot and self care has taken on a new meaning. My perspective has changed. I am physically unable to do things i used to, BUT GOD is here with me every step of the way. Slowing down to find His rest is so important. Thank you!
I take time to rest, to be still. I put on warm fuzzy socks and turn on the heating pad. ❤️
One way that I take care of myself (and I’m blessed to be able to almost daily), is to take it slow in the mornings. To really get still; meditate on the Word and slowly get the production train going!
I enjoy sitting down and reading for awhile, though its difficult to not feel guilty for doing so. I also like to do Bible study in peace and quiet, when I can find it anyway.
I long and wonder is there someone on earth to love me, to give me hug and to just be there. I have bouts of loneliness, I was the oldest and always taking care of everyone. But there is no one to take care of me. I serve and worship God, I am by no means sinless. I believe in the promises but sometimes I still feel alone.
I love where you say, God doesn’t want us to do more for him. He wants to take care of us! This is such a beautiful reminder of the truth that I need in my life. Thank you!
I struggle with feeling unworthy of care and love. I often try to convince myself that God has far more important things to do than worry about me and my feelings. Thank you for this wonderful reminder that God truly cares for me and loves me. I do matter, because I matter to Him. I don’t do it often enough, but on occasion I like to buy a bouquet of flowers for myself or get a relaxing pedicure.
I love this blog post. I enjoy taking care of myself by working out to my favorite Christian workout podcast or listening to a Christian meditation podcast.
I find whenever I take time to create by painting, scrapbooking, or or stringing beads, I feel refreshed.
I also love to take time outdoors enjoying God’s creation by hiking in cooler weather and swimming in hotter weather in my backyard oasis!
To be able to sit in reflection in the early mornings in my FAVORITE way to bless God(I focus solely on him) & myself. It relaxes me & rejuvenates me so I can face the world & the not-always-nice people in it
Taking care of myself has always been a struggle. I get to a point of exhaustion and then I don’t want to do anything which is also not healthy. I need to learn balance. One thing that has actually helped me recently is to take time to do some hiking. I love being in nature and enjoy the beauty God has given us and it helps me physically as well. It also helps me emotionally and puts my mind in a place of rest as I get away from the craziness that surrounds me. It is my time with God where He restores my soul as I take time to pray, listen to Scripture, sing praise music and just take time to be quiet and listen. There is so much to hear in the silence of a hiking trail!
My favorite way to take care of myself? Hmmm … in my life right now, that would be by taking a nap even if I have a long list of things to do. I don’t have a car right now, but if I did, then I would take a drive to the beach where I would walk along the shore, listen to all the wonderful sounds of surf and gulls and children playing, then sit in the sun’s warmth and simply ‘be’.