About the Author

Robin is the author of For All Who Wander, her relatable memoir about wrestling with doubt that reads much like a conversation with a friend. She's as Southern as sugar-shocked tea, married to her college sweetheart, and has three children. An empty nester with a full life, she's determined to...

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  1. Robin,
    I believe we all carry scars from the words of others. The ones that tend to cut the deepest are the sharp barbs thrown by those we love the most. They also leave the biggest scars. I kind of have a three step litmus test I run comments from others, lies from the enemy, and my own negative self-talk through: 1. Do these words cause me anxiety or guilt ? 2. Are these words condemning? 3. Most importantly, do they line up with what scripture says about me? If the answers are Yes, Yes, and No, then I know I need to unhook the lie from me and and let it just float on by. If it’s the enemy lies, I need to kick him to the curb. If it’s hurtful words from others, I need to set up boundaries. The scriptural truths you quoted are great to use to replace the lies. Whatever is good, pure, and lovey….meditate on these. Awesome reminders, Robin.
    Blessings,
    Bev xo

    • Bev,

      How wise to have a pre-emptive plan in place to stave off the words people fling your way. It is so easy to believe lies that have a little truth if we aren’t careful.

  2. I try to remember to TALK to myself, using words of Truth from God’s own heart, more than I listen to myself.
    And I’m wondering if, over the years, I will eventually hear His voice more loudly than all the others?

  3. Robin,

    Our country has become so divisive & hurtful. It seems people just let their words fly without thinking of the consequences. I am the worst for “trash talking” to myself. Do something wrong or make a wrong turn in life & I hear the lies “stupid, dumb, not good enough”. But God says differently. I need to value myself by what He says & not what I hear or the lies coming from enemy. Paul says in Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. In today’s world Grandpa Jake’s words could not be truer. It is getting harder to discern what is true & fake. We need to take everything we hear & put it to the test of what the Bible says. We are beloved, princesses of the Almighty King.

    Blessings 🙂

    • Blessings to you, Beth. Our words DO have consequences, the ones we offer and the ones we receive. Scripture sure has something to say about our tongues, doesn’t it?

  4. Yes! YEs!! YESSSS!!! So much truth here, Robin. Thank you for this reminder.

    And the turkeys were the bigger turkeys! 🙂

  5. “Or remember that misunderstanding you had with a friend who took something you said the wrong way and replied with venom-tipped rage?” Robin, I feel like you’ve read my diary. This happened to me a few years ago, and the devastating conversation still replays in my head – to think that the horrible things she said about me and our friendship were what she was actually carrying in her heart towards me! I’ve worked at deleting the words from my psyche, and will have to use Bev’s litmus test on them.
    I have indeed set boundaries in that relationship to protect my heart, but I’m always undecided as to whether that’s what God would have me do. Doesn’t He want me to put my heart out there and trust Him to protect it?

    • Some of this post is written from personal (painful) experience; and some inspired by others who’ve experienced the struggle of believing what others have placed on them (untruths). It is such a sad thing so many of us have been wounded in places that don’t make sense :(.

      And, hmmmm…I really don’t know if your question is the right one to ask, Subi; or maybe, I’m just not 100% sure of what you’re asking. God commands us to love others which is an intentional act of the will, right? Setting healthy boundaries is wise; and yes, He is completely trustworthy. I think it’s less a matter of putting our heart out there and more about fixing our eyes on Christ and following His lead in loving others. I’m praying for you, Subi! xo

      • Thanks for your response, Robin. I probably didn’t make myself very clear. Bev above mentioned her litmus test, and how if another person’s hurtful words don’t align with what scripture says about her, she sets up boundaries with that person. I have done that, and I guess I was just saying that I sometimes wonder if it’s okay to do that with people who have become toxic to you, or if God would want us NOT to set up boundaries and just trust Him to protect our hearts from the hurtful speech of others.

  6. I was struck with words “ love your neighbour as you love yourself” in scripture one day. How do we love ourselves? I know I am very hard on myself and find it hard to give myself grace. I am slowly learning with Gods help that I need to learn to be compassionate to myself. Self compassion I believe is so very important to our well being. We so often will show compassion to others but how compassionate are we to ourselves? Just something The Lord is teaching me on my journey that I need to talk to myself daily and reaffirm who He says I am. Also to learn to talk to myself as a I was talking to a close friend. Being “ kind” to myself. Kim Fredrickson has written a wonderful book called “ Give yourself a break” which talks about self compassion to ourselves. She wrote the book as she has been threw her own health struggles and how she learned to be compassionate to herself. Hope this can help someone else on their journey as it is something I feel is not talked about enough.

    Blessings!

    • Darlene, you make such a good point…being kind to ourselves doesn’t always come naturally. Some of us have to LEARN to speak with grace and love to ourselves! Thank you for your encouragement today.

  7. This song come to Mind. You probably know it. It’s no longer I that liveth but Christ that liveth in Me. I say Amen to that. We are all Daughter’s of the King. What Jesus say about us is all that matters. We are all beautiful in his eyes. Thank you for todays word.

    • Dawn, I’m not exactly sure of the particular song you’re mentioning, but I love that scripture! Christ in us is our hope! Thank you for these reminders :).

  8. Robin,

    I was verbally attacked in our office about 1 week ago by a fellow co-worker, she told me that “I” acted like I took ownership in the office, doing everything, (I do take ownership in my job, to do the best I can to make the day run smooth), she continued, by belittling me, her last words to be was, “ I want to punch you in the face”, was I afraid, YES, I am a 60+ women, as well as she also is the same age, I only have to work with her two mornings out of the week, this has scared me, even when I think I am not thinking about the given situation, I still break down and cry.
    I have told my boss, he is well aware, but Robin, why can I not get this out of my mind. I pray to God every morning, I know he loves me, I am a child of God, I just want this to go away. I was verbally abused by my Mother, I feel anytime someone says something bad to me, I go back to my childhood hearing all the bad words which were thrown at me.
    Thank you Robin for reading my reply, your post just spoke to me..

    Annie

    • Annie,
      I consider that work place harassment and a hostile work environment. Good for you taking to your boss. As much as we (I) avoid conflict, what she said is completely unacceptable. I pray your boss (human resources) acts on your behalf. It is your right to work in a peaceful, positive work environment. I am praying that the Holy Spirit permanently removes those words from your heart and mind. And what you are feeling in to response to her attack is valid. It will take time to process that situation. May this brightly through you and minister to your co-worker.

    • Annie,

      Oh my…your work situation sounds tough, and your co-worker’s words are not acceptable. Talking to your boss was the right thing to do, and I hope he helps this person on a personal and professional level.

      But you, sweet (in)friend…you carry years’ old scars from your childhood. I’m praying as I write for you to receive healing from the Lord, that you hear HIS voice and love over the words of your mother. Meditate and memorize some of the linked scriptures included in my post to remind you who you are!! Loved, cherished, known, and God’s child.

      ((hugs))

  9. What an awesome devotion and look at the lies we believe. This really struck a chord in me on many, many levels. Thank you for sharing this inspiring and insightful word. Finally, someone said it, words do hurt. You seem to have read my life in a snap shot. Being overly sensitive doesn’t help my Woolf’s and pain either, but o have found healing in His word and more insight into why some things hurt so badly when they come from loved ones and friends. God Bless you! Wow! And it puts me on notice about my speech and treatment of others. We are living in evil times where the love of many is waxing cold especially in the Church. I expect it from the the world and society but fellow brothers and sister-wow! Thank you for sharing.

    • Sherry, so thankful to “meet” you, and I’m so thankful timing of this post was helpful for you. Indeed, words CAN hurt, and to say they don’t , doesn’t make it so. Over all who have felt a similar pain, I am praying for everyone to HEAR God’s voice over the lies of our enemy or others.

  10. Erasmus said, “A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit.” His logic could be applied to driving out lies with truth, I think. Knowledge of scriptural truth equips us to dispense with lies. The five statements of fact near the end of your post, Robin, provide some strong nails to have in our emotional toolboxes–ready to apply when lies need to be driven out. It would be worth our time to keep collecting, as God reveals more in his Word! With Bev above, I concur that preparation is key.