The one who walks with the wise will become wise . . .
Proverbs 13:20a
I sat in the church pew with my friends — Michelle on my right and Lyla on my left — to sing the songs, eat the bread, drink the wine, pray the prayers, and listen to the message. I wanted to reach out and grab my friends’ hands, but I didn’t. Fear of freaking out my friends meant I kept my hands in my lap. Later, in the parking lot, I told them, “I almost reached out and grabbed your hands, but I didn’t want to freak you out.”
“You should have,” they both told me. “It would have been fine.”
When my husband and I visited Europe, we walked down street after street, in city after city, and saw pairs of women walking arm-in-arm everywhere we looked. They walked closely and it was clear their friendships were treasures.
I said to my husband, “I’m going to do that when we get home. I’m going to walk arm-in-arm with my girlfriends.”
Friendship is a gift. I’ve learned that the hard way. Finding someone who will talk you back from the edge, encourage you to follow your dream, stay up talking until 3:00 am, eat ice cream with you — straight from the container — hear your darkest confessions without flinching, and keep showing up anyway? That’s a gift. No, a treasure.
If you’ve got one good friend, you’ve got a treasure, that’s for sure. If you’ve got more than one good friend, you have what I’ve heard called an embarrassment of riches. I want my friends to know how much I love them. I want them to know they have saved my sanity on more than one occasion. I want them to know that sometimes my heart overflows with gratitude and love for them. So I’m turning a deaf ear to the voice that tells me I might just freak out my friends if I let them know how much they mean to me. A friend loves at all times. It’s as simple as that.
Decide today to become the kind of friend who hears others’ darkest confessions without flinching. Walking together, arm in arm. A friend who loves at all times.
This message was written by Deidra Riggs and appears in A Moment to Breathe: 365 Devotions that Meet You in Your Everyday Mess, the devotional from the (in)courage community. It’s on sale now at DaySpring for just $16.99, and also available wherever books are sold.
A friend loves at all times. It’s as simple as that. - @deidrariggs in #amomenttobreathe from the @incourage community: Click To Tweet Leave a Comment
Deidra and (in)courage,
I noticed that as well – women walking arm in arm – while in Europe. Here in the US we are so afraid of infringing upon others’ personal space, but I agree we need to treasure our friends. I have a group of gal friends and we call ourselves “The Perseverance Posse” lol. We have all been through similar experiences in life (including the devastation of divorce) and we have all held each other up at one point or another. We grab hands, hug necks, and next time I’m going to walk arm in arm. Truly, a friend loves at ALL times, especially in the hard times. Lovely.
Blessings,
Bev xx
Deidra!
I came to the end of this post and thought, “OH! I’ve needed to hear this friend’s voice!”
Blessings to you!
There is one friend I hold hands with all the time! It feels so safe. At first I was like “is this weird?” But no, no it’s not… it’s a gift as you say. Women need friendships like tbis!
Amen!
I am blessed to say I have three very close friends, actually treasures. I can recall doing a charity walk with one of those friends and we walked some of the time arm in arm…oh my, the curious looks we got. I knew what some were thinking but I know God’s opinion of me is all that matters. I will love my treasures without worry of freaking them out…or anyone else. Loved this devotion, thank you for those words!
Deidra,
We are so self conscience here in US. Afraid to show our true feelings for fear of how others might perceive us. God made us for community. We need female companions to share life with. Sometimes they are the only ones who will understand us. I’m blessed to have a couple groups of women who “get” me. They have either walked the path I’m on or will soon walk it. We can pray for each other. One group calls ourselves “The Final Five”. We were the first to work together at a clinic. We all left not long after each other. We meet once a month to “do life”.
I find it refreshing to have female friends with whom I can talk open & honest about my feelings & what’s going on in life. One good friend (hubby’s ex-mother in law) & I went through aging parents together. We consoled each other & I fed her several times in one year. She in turn fed me when my dad died. Such great friendships. Each friend is a true blessing from God.
Blessings 🙂
Deidre Riggs! Oh, so wonderful to read your post today. Just a few days ago, a friend said, “You know who I miss seeing and reading? Deidre!” Warmest thanks for for blessing us today!
That’s what I was thinking as well, Patricia! Love, love, love (an always feels like she’s writing just for my heart) Deidre!
I love this so much… As an introvert, I don’t have many friends but I am so thankful for the few that I do have. And as always, I remind them that as part of being my friend, one perk I do provide is my ability to text them with insane thoughts at all time of the day or night. They know I am just a little crazy and I am almost certain that one day, they will realize this and leave me. Haven’t happened yet and I pray it will never happen. When there is true friendship, doesn’t matter how crazy this life gets, we find comfort in knowing they understand us and still loves us regardless. I am so blessed beyond measure and even during loss, 4 becomes 3, I know we are all in it together to walk through the struggles with each other. Thank you PJ and Livia for loving me. Save us a seat Zer Cha… We will see you again.
The nice thing about being a teenager, and American, and a theater kid is that people assume you’re going to be weird, and then you live up to their expectations. Walking through Disney World with my best friend, our arms over each other’s shoulders and our legs synced (we joked that we were gonna crush it in a three-legged-race sometime), is a memory that I will treasure. Thanks for the reminder of how special true friends are. <3
I treasure those who have reached out to me in friendship. We never have to sit alone and someone is always there to give comfort where comfort is needed. We are not afraid to express our love for each other as fellow Christians, some as fellow widows, some not, but all “Pew Sisters” and all friends, walking arm in arm. Thank you for this reminder that yes, it is ok to express love for your friends. Just as Jesus loves us.
Hi!
Forgive me for asking for information here but I have been waiting for the (in)courage online Bible Study and I have not gotten anything. I signed up for it several weeks ago. Also I am not on Facebook. I do have an (in)courage Devotional that my daughter gave me for Christmas. Hoping someone sees this and looks into it for me. I don’t know where else to contact you.
Thank you.
Glenda