In college, I was one of those people that was always doing something with friends. I was in volunteer organizations. I was an RA and planned events for my residents. I would study at the library in small groups.
In short, as a young adult, I thrived being in community with other people. I didn’t realize then that this lifestyle of working well with others and valuing friendship would impact my professional life after graduation.
I met my future husband while in college (he lived in Nashville and I lived in Wisconsin) and we got married a few months after I graduated. All of a sudden, I was in a new city, had a new husband, and knew no one except my new co-workers.
In that first job, I learned the value of friendship at work. I was quickly embraced not just as a professional, but as a friend. The people I worked with threw me a bridal shower, and then a few years later, a baby shower. They were the people I told my everyday ordinary and extraordinary stories. They were the ones who came to the hospital when my oldest was born and celebrated like extended family.
Fifteen years later, my job has changed, but the value I have found in the people I work with hasn’t. Some of my closest friends work alongside me. It is a joy to go to work because of the people in my office. Which is why, when my office bestie announced that she was getting a new job, I sobbed. To say I am both thrilled for her and devastated for me is not an understatement. She has given me the gift of understanding, trust, and kindness that is a rare gift.
We see in Scripture time and again how much Jesus valued and invested in the people He worked with – the disciples. He knew them well. He loved them. And His ministry flourished, in part, because they were invested not just in the work of spreading the gospel, but in one another.
Here are three ways to foster community in your workplace:
Celebrate the big and little moments: YES to balloons, banners, cards, and gifts. YES to bridal and baby showers. YES to hugs and shouts of joy. By joining your co-workers in celebrating wins of any kind – from a victory in the boardroom to a new baby – you are saying to them, I see you. You matter. Your joy is my joy.
Do life outside of work: Yes, I know you are likely with these people a lot already. But the only way to go deeper with someone is to get together outside of work. I recently was invited by a colleague to her home for a night making homemade pasta – and then eating it. There were five of us in all, and the night was delightful. We talked about so much life – from family challenges and work dynamics to favorite books and more. I left feeling so much closer to each of the women there.
Practice gratitude: Letting your co-workers know they are appreciated is incredibly important. Never forget the way positive, kind words can make an impact on others. Say thank you for good work, inclusion, and support. I often include words like “I appreciate you,” “thank you for being someone I can come to,” or “thank you for thinking to include me on this” to convey my gratitude.
If you work, share a way you invest in workplace friendship. Let’s inspire one another to love our co-workers well.
For more on the beauty and challenges of work, read Jessica’s new book: Stretched Too Thin: How Working Moms Can Lose the Guilt, Work Smarter, and Thrive.
Never forget the way positive, kind words can make an impact on others. - @jessicanturner: Click To Tweet Leave a Comment
When I decided to leave my job to stay home with my oldest son, I missed so many things about my working life, and at the top of the list was my wonderful network of co-worker friends. Twenty-five years later, there are still those I keep in touch with!
I love that you are still in community with those co-workers!
Jessica,
I work from home, so my co-worker is a floppy eared beagle lol. Sometimes taking time out to just sit with him and stroke his smooth fur is de-stressing and calming to the soul. I also work with a human Board of Directors and volunteers around the US and I find that everyone needs and thrives on a word of encouragement or having their good work called out in front of the group. Who doesn’t like a standing ovation…even if it’s an emoji ovation?
Blessings,
Bev xx
You are such a joy, Bev!
Jessica,
I’ve had different work places & styles. At one clinic I worked they all celebrated my 50th birthday with balloons, cards & food. It was nice to be remembered. We also talked life between 5 of us. We ate lunch together & enjoyed being with each other. We have all left that place. Each month we try to get together for dinner & chit chat. Let’s catch up on life. Things have changed a lot over the years. One is going through breast cancer, one will graduate college next year, one has a challenging job & home life & work for a small business. We text & keep up with each other. In my current job there are 3 of us in the office. I often thank them for helping me with my job. Yes-it is important to develop good relations with some co-workers. After all you will spend a good amount of time with them.
Blessings 🙂
Beth, thank you for sharing stories from your own life. Sounds like you are blessing to those with whom you work.
I work in a retail setting. I am not the oldest of my co-workers but there are a lot of younger men and women working with me. Not long ago one such young women was promoted to coordinator of the front line. She was very difficult to work with but one day I decided to do what ever I could to help her be successful. This meant treating with respect and offering to help her whenever I had the opportunity. We have developed a good working relationship and a friendship.
Beautiful testimony of maturity in humility 🙂
Love how your heart changed and that you have been so meaningful in her life!
I am the secretary/bookkeeper at our church. The lady that cleans the church has become one of my best friends. We share our lives with each other and pray and laugh together. When she leaves to go home I always thank her for what she has done. She is a blessing to our church an me personally and I don’t want to take for granted how important her job is.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. Love that you have cultivated a special friendship.
I relate to this very much. I built long time friendships with some coworkers, some over 30 years together. We saw marriages, babies, divorces, and even deaths. Struggled with aging parents and shared our hopes and dreams as well as miseries together. Some left and came back to work as if they never left, some left to go on to something better. As each one left, whether to go to a better job, raise children or retire we have tried to stay in contact as much as possible, get together several times a year when we can. It’s not easy when everyone has busy lives of their own so each get together has a different combination of friends. It was my turn to leave last August when I decided to take early retirement. It was not an easy decision. My coworkers had become family. My chosen career was a part of my life for so long. But it was my turn to leave and I knew it was the best thing for me. I miss some of the friends very much but today’s technology makes it easier to stay connected. But most of all our faith keeps us connected when we can’t be together. I Praise the Lord for the Blessings of these great people who became family.