About the Author

Mary is a writer and speaker who lives for good books, spicy queso, and television marathons – but lives because of God’s grace. She writes about giving up on perfect and finding truth in unexpected places at MaryCarver.com. Mary and her husband live in Kansas City with their two daughters.

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  1. So thankful, Mary, that in Christ alone, we have the gift of being able to look squarely at what frightens us, to call it what it is (BAD!), and then to trust a good God. His record of faithfulness in the past is our best defense against fear over the future. May we trust together for grace to bring this to mind whenever fear shows up.

  2. Mary,
    Don’t you love those teachable moments God gives us? Where we get to teach our children Truth about God and how He uses them to teach us His Truth? When I get locked in fear, I do forget that fear is a choice. Granted, when you have an anxiety disorder it artificially heightens that fear, but still when the worry, doubt, fear, anxiety come rushing in, it is good for my soul to remember all the Ebenezers – all the times God has been with me, never let me go, seen me through. It doesn’t mean it will be easy and I will have a never disturbed sense of peace, but it does mean that He is faithful and when it comes to the fork in the road, I need to choose faith. Even when I am faithless….He is still faithful. What an awesome God we have. Thank you for this wonderful reminder this am.!
    Blessings,
    Bev xx
    ps. It’s a universal law that only one out of four flashlights (if you can remember where they are) will actually work lol.

    • Ebenezers? I like the Dickens’ analogy. And yes, whether, universal or Murphy’s law, only one flashlight works. I suppose should buy those can that you can freeze or run over after all.

      • Rebecca,
        I should have defined Ebenezers….I know most people think of Dickens, but here’s the Bible Dictionary definition and reference. I guess when trouble comes my way and I’m bitten by fear I look back over the “Stones of help” that I have erected in the times that God has come to my aid. In my case, my life has many….Blessings, Bev

        Ebenezer
        Bible Dictionary Smith’s Bible Dictionary
        (stone of help), a stone set up by Samuel after a signal defeat of the Philistines, as a memorial of the “help” received on the occasion from Jehovah. (1 Samuel 7:12)

  3. Thank you Mary! This is my biggest struggle and my husband, who should help me the most to overcome this, plays on this struggle every day of my life. I woke up this morning needing this so greatly and of course, God provided!
    God bless you!

  4. A very timely message for me as I am having surgery next week. Just yesterday I copied Joshua 1:9 on my iPad home screen so I would see it often. Thanks for the reminder.

    • Praying for you, your family, surgeons and hospital staff, as you head into surgery next week, Denise. Jesus is the great physician and he is in charge!

  5. Thank you for this reminder of what’s true this morning, especially these last sentences: “Nothing can defeat our God who cares deeply about you. He will never leave you alone; He will be with you wherever you go (no matter how dark it gets).”

    I’m facing a dark darkness right now, where even God feels distant. This helped reassure me of what I know, even when it’s hard to feel – that he’s still there no matter how deep the darkness.

  6. I’m a little confused on why the power going out would call for pie at Perkins that late in the day? If it was bedtime, why would someone need to go sit in the car? Not to miss the point of the story. I enjoy the quote, “Fear is a choice and so is faith.” That quote works well for adults in there Christian walk.

    • She mentioned the drive to perkins was to allow her to charge her phone battery in the car. I’m sure you can understand that no one wants to be stuck at home with a dead phone when there’s no electricity.

  7. Thank you- needed to hear this after me & 3 shortie-tornado-blessings are limping through our last week of summer!!

  8. Thank you Mary for such a timely study. I am “chicken little”, the sky is falling, the sky is falling. Yes, a few pieces of the sky were falling when my 13 year old foster son ran away and crashed my car at one in the morning. I also have to remember how many times my parents dealt with me as a rebellious teenager and the sky did not fall; for here I am today. The daughter of our merciful Savious.
    My choice today is to have Faith. Blessings to you.

  9. Awe, what sweet memories this will make. I remember many a night sitting up with little boys who were afraid of the dark. Now they fear nothing, it seems…which gives their mama much more to fear. 🙂 So thankful that God is always with them in their dark times and in their shenanigan times. (There are many. 🙂 ) — And, oh so thankful for his ever-present light in my life. — Thanks for sharing, Mary. 🙂

  10. Joshua 1:9 is one of my favorites! He is indeed with us wherever we go! I lost my job a few months back and was working at a job that was ok, but not really working out the best for us. When my hours were cut I didn’t understand and became very anxious, and yes, afraid.
    The Lord spoke to my heart and said, I’ve got it all under control.
    I needed to trust Him.
    Today I had an interview and God gave me the most wonderful position! I was repentant because I was trying to do things on my own and not waiting on Him!
    He is wonderful!
    Thank you for this perfect post today! It was just what I needed!

  11. Mary, my dear Sister in Christ,

    Thank you SO much for sharing what the Holy Spirit has taught you with your fellow believers. I was nodding in the affirmative with each sentence that I read from your post. I was especially blessed by the following point and scriptural reference:
    “But the next time I’m gripped by fear and tempted to give in, I’m going to remember what I told my little girl at bedtime. I’m going to remember what God has done for me in the past, how He has loved me and protected me and walked beside me and carried me. I’m going to choose faith.”
    Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
    Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed,
    for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. (Joshua 1:9)

    You are sooooo right that faith is indeed a CHOICE that only you can make for yourself. We have to affirmatively CHOOSE to trust God NO MATTER what we face. This post is especially encouraging with all of the destructive things that are occurring in God’s world today. In these times, we as the Body of Christ must ‘hold fast to the hope we profess for the One who promised is FAITHFUL’ Hebrews 10:23.
    I thank God for opportunities to choose faith over fear, as it is in those times that our Heavenly Father reminds me that He was NOT surprised by the event I am facing, that He has a winning battle plan, and that He has ALREADY won, and the enemy is already a DEFEATED FOE. Our God is AWESOME!!!

    thank you once again and God bless you Mary

    Laurel

  12. Thank-you for this challenging and comforting reminder. Even though I’ve been a Christian for many, many years, it’s still a lesson I must remind myself of often!

    I love that we get to choose.

  13. I sure needed this today! Today is the day I’ve feared for the past 29 years. The day my baby girl might choose to commit her life to the “wrong” man, a man who chooses another god from the One I’ve raised her to love and obey. Today is the day that man has chosen to propose. My daughter has run from God the past 3 years and my heart has been so broken. But day before yesterday, I felt the Holy Spirit say He was looking to bring both of them into an intimate relationship with him and could use me to to that if I would just continue to love them and make myself willing. And TRUST! Those words have helped me release a fear that has accompanied me way too long. Today, as I await her call with her news, I will make the choice to trust in my Savior that He is in control, no matter what it looks like through my eyes.

  14. Mary,
    Thank-you for sharing your touching story with us here today.

    Have a blessed day all,

    Penny

  15. Mary, you are so funny. From the get-go, you had my interest with the healthy/not so healthy line. I always look forward to reading your posts! You are a gifted writer. Rock on.

  16. I liked this a lot, thanks so much. I needed to remember today God’s faithfulness in the past and how He promises it always. I was faced today with my quickly dwindling bank account and fear and panic took residency in my head and heart. Soon bitterness moved in too. Sigh. I just feel like God does always provide…but it’s usually just exaaaaactly what I need, not much more. I’m not saying I don’t appreciate it; I truly do. It’s just I wish there were more breathing space. I know it’s meant, as my husband says, to grow my dependency on God. If I had too much, I wouldn’t depend on Him. I’ve always loved the proverb that says God give me what I need, not too little that I steal and disappoint You, but not too much that I would forget You. I guess God heard that prayer! Mary, thank You again for this; I love your sincere writing style. Blessings to you and your family.

  17. Isn’t everything a choice, even to love? And oh right you are about children wanting to have their way and learning quickly how to use it. I worked in family daycare, and most of the time children really showed fear when hurt though I had one little girl who actually quaked in her boots. She went on to like figure skating, chess and tennis, instead of hiding under the porch swing. God’s love helped her overcome, it’s all that will. Remember, that we are His righteousness only because of Him, and fear, terror and torment has to stay away, from us, even if it tries to come. Isaiah 54.

  18. I had been praying about a situation that is going on in my life and I had asked God to not let my fear overwhelm my faith. Thank you very much for this. Things like this is the encouragement that God sends our way to let us know that He is there. This is helping me to make faith the natural reaction as opposed to fear. It is so easy to fall on the fear side when we know on the faith side is the strength that we need.

  19. Mary,

    It is amazing how God can use children to teach us lessons. God clearly states “Do not Fear” for I am with you. There are times in life when we face trials that cause us to fear & tremble a bit. If we would recall scripture, or Ebenezers and pray to God then He will help calm our anxious thoughts. We need to always choose faith over fear. That is the motto of one of our elementary school principals. He was diagnosed with ALS 3 years ago and lving/fighting a public fight.

    Blessings 🙂

  20. First thing I read when I woke up for church. Such a blessing, and gift from God, through you! Thank You Lord and God bless you my sister. Keep spreading the Good News!
    xoxo

  21. Wonderful story but I don’t totally agree. Fear is a feeling. We cannot choose whether that feeling comes to us. But we can make a choice over the amount of power we give that feeling. We can choose to trust in God in spite of our fear. And He will take care of it. He always does.