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  1. Eryn,
    I can so relate to your story. Having just moved from the east coast to a town in the mid west where I knew no one, with a 3 month old baby (my first), in the frigid throws of January, I remember it all pouring in on me (hormones not helping). I sobbed into my pillow while my daughter napped. I remember, like you, the only word/name I could get out between sobs was “Jesus”. It’s amazing when anguish cuts down to our very bones, our prayer become very simple. When the rubber meets the road, my prayers are not eloquent, they are gutteral – the groans of the Holy Spirit within me. “Jesus”….when I get to the end of my rope of self sufficiency, His name become my earnest prayer. I wish I could say that everything was instantly okay or peace totally washed over me…it didn’t, but I had a comforting “knowing” that Jesus was there….He saw and heard me….things would not instantaneously be okay, but He was in control and He had this. Things eventually began to look upward, but as I waited, I knew I wasn’t waiting alone. I can have all the wonderful connection and community in the world, but if I don’t have it with my Savior….then I am still alone. Thank you for a real and touching post…
    Bev xx

    ps. To answer your question, I can let my work and my human friendships become substitutes for the relationship I have with Jesus. Starbucks can soothe minor temper tantrums though 😉

  2. Great post, Erin! Psalm 34:18 was that exact verse that the Lord whispered to me when years ago, in a deep pit of despair, I cried out to Him, “You’ve pushed me beyond what I can take!”

    Thanks for the reminder to identify our false sense of comfort!

  3. Thank-you for touching me with your words Eryn. You have reminded us that we are not alone, no matter the despair. During hard times He has carried me, and I am extremely grateful.

    Have a blessed day all,


  4. Eryn,

    I remember last January (2016) when my dad’s dementia got really bad. He was hospitalized for one month. I would come home from visiting him and cry out to Jesus “why oh why Lord can’t he just die–everyone else seems to”. I was frustrated with not knowing what to expect next. It was hard! After one month of that & one month of rehab he was back to normal. He could go to assisted living again. God had allowed me to see a miracle!!!

    One song that I cling to is “God is in Control”. My latte is junk food & wine. I would come home & drink small amounts of wine & eat some pretzels, chips. It helped me relax some. I know that God is the only one who can fix it all. I would pray a lot aloso.

    Blessings 🙂

  5. Remembering to cry out to The One that holds our hearts is so tough sometimes. I have learned to look at the “big picture” in 2017. It’s not all about me and what I want. It’s about God and what He wants to do THROUGH me. Thank you for your encouraging words. I have shared Psalms 34:18 many times with those that have lost loved ones. But it takes on another meaning when I am in my own mess and chaos. But those words are a promise of His comfort and peace.

  6. Today is one of those days, my spirit is distraught … I have a silent scream and my head is spinning. I know things have to change!!

  7. I feel my challenge is to reach out to God and not reach out to a friend. My first response to challenging things is to reach out to a friend, my sister, someone human – to talk it through, to complain, to cry. But over the past year, I have felt that God is wanting me to take it all to Him first. I find it challenging and sometimes not as comforting just because I don’t have a human response commiserating with me.