Since we’ve been given the biblical mandate that we all belong to each other {Romans 12:5, NLT}, this fall at (in)courage we wanted to spend some deliberate time together unpacking what that means.
To focus on what it means to love my neighbor as myself.
To open our hearts for dialogue about what it might look like to walk around in someone else’s shoes.
So we’re hosting a conversation here every Wednesday for the next few weeks about what it looks like to do life in a way that reflects the timely truth that we actually are better together. Won’t you join us as we invite writers from our community to share what doing life Better Together has looked like in real time for them?
And then consider what living life — like we are better together — might look like for you too.
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My friend Crystal Paine had never traveled further abroad than the Dominican Republic when she took an 18-hour plane ride with me to South Africa.
She was coming to see first hand the community center, water point, and vegetable garden our blog readers had built together through our partnership with Help One Now in South Africa.
It was hot and often uncomfortable. There were plenty of awkward moments. Because anytime you open your door to your neighbor, whether they live across the street or across the globe, it can get bumpy.
I asked Crystal if she’d share some of those moments with you all — a behind-the-scenes look at what it’s like to walk around in someone else’s shoes and someone else’s story that is so totally different than your own.
Because sometimes that’s the best way to discover what we have in common.
From Crystal (also known as Money Saving Mom):
I am the girl who is afraid of meeting new people. The girl who doesn’t like to go outside her comfort zone. The girl who doesn’t like unknowns. The girl who had never been on an airplane for longer than 5 hours.
But I had this deep down peace in my heart that this was the next step in my journey. That I wasn’t just supposed to send money or encouragement from far away. That I was supposed to step outside my comfort zone and GO.
To meet the local leaders and hear from them personally. To see the needs with my own eyes.
To experience what life is like in South Africa. To better understand the struggles of this community. To bring encouragement and hope to those who are working tirelessly to make an impact.
Stepping outside your comfort zone and taking risks isn’t usually glamorous business. I think we sometimes idealize what risk-taking will be like.
We picture wild adventures. Thrilling exploits. Amazing feats. While that is often some of what happens, there’s usually a whole lot of awkward and hard work in between.
In fact, in between all the wonderful things on our South Africa trip, there was also a fair share of sweat, dirt, vomit, and tears involved. I’m learning that’s part of the whole stepping-outside-your-comfort-zone gig.
There were many times (especially at first) when I couldn’t understand someone’s accent. After asking them to repeat themselves three times and you still didn’t understand, it was hard to know what to do or say.
There were times when I could tell that the person I was talking to didn’t have any idea what I was saying because they couldn’t understand my accent or American phrases.
There were times when I was given food to eat that was very different than anything I was used to.
There were times when it seemed everyone else knew what was going on and I didn’t have a clue.
There were times when a child would do or say something that broke your heart so much you could barely hold in the tears.
Yes, there was a lot of awkwardness mixed in with the trip. There were many times when I didn’t know what to do, say, or be.
But if I had chosen to avoid those awkward moments, I would have missed out on so many awesome moments. Moments that were goose-bump-inducing and incredibly amazing.
And so I encourage you: stop playing it safe. Step out. Jump out. Take risks.
It will be awkward, tiring, exhausting, and monotonous at times. But don’t let that hold you back from getting to know the people God places in your path.
Embrace the awkward and you’ll get to experience the awesome.
And I’m so glad that I did.
Getting to meet such amazing people face-to-face, seeing their difficulties firsthand, walking their streets, sleeping in their homes, eating their food, and attending their church services helped me understand their culture better, yes.
But it also allowed me to have a better understanding of the issues they are facing and how I could play a part in helping take some of the stress and burdens off of their shoulders.
Because sometimes we forget there are women like us living in places like Hammanskraal, South Africa. Women who wake up worried, who pinch pennies, and who still find ways to keep opening their doors to their neighbors.
Women like Elizabeth from the Reagoboka Drop-in Centre and Early Childhood Development Centre who host after-school care in their homes for kids whose parents work in the cities till long after dark.
When we asked Elizabeth how many kids she would be willing to care for this year, she was confused. Because, as she explained, “We don’t close the door to anyone.”
Elizabeth is the epitome of hope.
And we got to meet the children and we were blown away by the joy on their faces, the spark in their eyes, and the zest they all have for life.
And we get to partner with Elizabeth in her remarkable, everyday work of changing lives, slowly, one child at a time.
Finding ways to connect is going to look different to each and every one of us. We all have unique gifts, talents, abilities, and passions. We all have different capacities and callings.
Elizabeth serves kids in her back yard.
I get to serve them from my blog. And for three amazing days, in person.
The world needs your gifts, your talents, and your willingness to start somewhere. To connect with someone. To be willing to be uncomfortable in order to understand someone else’s story.
Right where you are, right now.
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