While we don’t have plans to do a formal (in)RL gathering this year, God has put it on our hearts to continue to encourage and equip women to gather in real life throughout the year — not just one weekend.
Since the last weekend in April holds a special place in our hearts, we want to launch our first “Girlfriend Gathering” Saturday, April 25th. We’ll spend each Wednesday in April sharing our own “friendship on purpose” stories, with topics to inspire you as you gather with your own friends. Then, on April 25th, get together with the women God puts on your heart for a few hours of fun and fellowship!
Each Wednesday we’ll include a challenge, invitation, or resource to help you as you plan, but there will be no set agenda, theme, or to-do list for the Girlfriend Gathering.
It’s as simple as this: Invite your girlfriends to gather. Plan as much or as little as God has put on your heart. Let’s do some (in)RL community together, yeah?
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Yes, it is true . . . I can be a bit of a worrier, a perfectionist, an over-thinker. I know I shouldn’t be. Believe me, I know. It is something that is a work-in-progress with me. I am trying.
So when it comes to having company over, my wheels start turning. I mean, everyone wants things to be “perfect” when they have company over, right? But I know how easy it is to go overboard with the over-thinking.
I have come to learn that “perfect” is not what matters. Making people feel loved and welcome is what matters. They are going to remember how they felt more than they will remember if I finally painted the hallway that has paint samples all over it. Nobody is going to take note of what is done or not done in my home, so why should I let those things stress me out so much?
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” {Philippians 4:6-7}
My worries and perfectionism and over-thinking is just that . . . mine. It is all me. Me and my worry, not that of my friends. They aren’t concerned with those things. And when I let my worries overcome me, I am letting them steal my peace and the peace of those I want to welcome into my home.
If my friends have to use a bathroom that has old seashell wallpaper lifting at the corners because we have not removed it to paint since we moved in . . . that is okay.
If they have to eat something that is healthier than it is gooey and sweet because I have diabetes and that is how I eat . . . that is okay.
What matters most is to welcome friends into my home and love them where I am.
“Serve one another humbly in love.” {Galatians 5:13}
I don’t need to impress my friends with the “perfect” anything; I want to impress them with kindness and joy and love. It is the love that will resonate in their hearts. It is my choice to stress and worry — or my choice to simply love. I choose love. God first loved us, and I want to demonstrate His love to those around me.
God loves us and He wants us to love. Welcoming others into our home, regardless of what is perfect or not-so-perfect, is loving.
I encourage you to plan your own Girlfriend Gathering! And do not let worry steal your peace . . . just step out in faith and love!
“Do everything in love.” {1 Corinthians 16:14}
Written with love from Jennifer, StudioJRU.
{“Do everything in love” art}
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Community Challenge: We know getting together with friends can be easier said than done. So we’re going to be brave together. Will you join us and pray about the ladies God would like you to invite for a fun girlfriend gathering and send them a “save the date?” You can download and share one here.
For more Girlfriend Gathering resources, head here! We’ll keep updating it throughout the month.
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Jennifer,
The Girlfriend Gathering sounds like fun 🙂 Thank you and (in)courage for all the special things you do to build community! A mentor of mine when I was younger impressed upon me the difference between “entertaining” and “hospitality”. Entertaining is when you get stressed out wanting everything to be perfect and the emphasis is on you and how lovely your home is and how beautiful the food looks that you prepared. Hospitality switches the focus to your guest(s) and it offers a listening ear as to how they are and what’s going on in their lives. It’s a Me to You tradeoff. I’ve always tried to keep that in mind when I think I can’t have someone over because you can write your initials in the dust on my coffee table lol. Great post!
Blessings,
Bev
Oh yes, Bev! That is a great way to think about it. Hospitality is what to strive for… not entertaining! Dust bunnies and all! 😉
Ugh! I’m an anxious person in general. Having company over. Going on vacations. I’ve seriously tried to let go. Better start “letting” God.
I get it, Kim! Praying He helps ease that anxiety for you… I know it’s hard. Be gentle with yourself, friend.
well, i’ve just started a Pintrest board “friends” and i’m not sure how to work it so if you could help by posting on my board i’d appreciate it
You are so right, Jennifer. Almost all of our house guests won’t even notice a bit of dust, smudges on the walls, or crumbs on the counter. Countless times over the years I’ve been in homes where the hostess will apologize for the condition of something in her home. Most of the time I haven’t even noticed. And If I had, it didn’t matter. We all LIVE in our homes. They are not museums! Nevertheless, I have stressed myself about cleaning for company and wanting everything just right. Truth is, that kind of attitude just fuels my pride. I need to fight against that! Thank you for the worthwhile reminders, Jennifer.
How’s the piano playing (note clunking) coming, Nancy?
Thinking of you when I do make time to play 🙂
Bev, you are so kind to ask. The most I’ve played are a few nursery tunes for our two year old granddaughter. Every time I pass by the piano I think, Get out the music. Get on those keys. Part of my problem is the house we now live in, with an open floor plan. Most of the time I love the spaciousness, but it does mean I can’t play the piano without causing disturbance. (Our previous homes had separate living rooms and family rooms.) So glad you are making time to play!
Yes… I have heard people apologize for things I would have never noticed! You are right, we are not visiting a friend the same way we would visit a museum! Love it, Nancy!
Jennifer, I’ve had times where I’ve struggled with the “need” to impress with my home, the food I serve. Early in my marriage, a sweet older woman shared that we should practice hospitality, regardless of how our homes look. People will remember how they were treated, not how nice the digs were.
I loved this line: What matters most is to welcome friends into my home and love them where I am.
May that be what I do every day. Thanks for sharing this.
And, I’m praying about the Girlfriend Gathering. What a super idea!
That is a very wonderful lesson about hospitality she shared with you, Jeanne. So sweet of her to pass that on… and thank you for sharing too!
I wish more people would invite others over. I don’t look at how clean or “perfect” the house is–I enjoy the company! Good food and friends is what I aim for!
Yes… the company is so nice to have, isn’t it, Beth?!
I planned a girlfriend gathering just over a month ago. No one came. Everyone said it was a great idea. I got a babysitter for my kids got some snacks. It was a gathering of sisters in Christ. Again no one came. That was followed by the embarrassment of everyone asking how it went. I am still trying to process the whole thing.
Oh no. I am so sorry to hear that, RB. I know how hurtful that must have been. I hope that God heals the hurt and that you can try again to welcome these girlfriends into your home… by His grace!
Me too. That is so hard
I have recently begun having a Friendship Breakfast every 4-6 weeks on Saturday mornings. Just a few of my friends here, some yummy breakfast food we all help supply, pretty flowers on the table, and fun as well as serious conversation. We always end with sharing prayer requests and a time of prayer. I was trying to decide on the date or our next breakfast when I came upon this post. It will be April 25! 🙂
Oh that sounds so fun, Victoria! What a wonderful gathering in friendship!