About the Author

Former Bad Girl, grateful for the grace God offers. Happy wife of Bill, one of the Good Guys. Proud mom of two grown-up kids with tender hearts. Lame housekeeper. Marginal cook. Pitiful gardener. Stuff I love? Encouraging my sisters in Christ—across the page, from the platform, online, in person. Unpacking...

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  1. Liz,
    You express, so well, a journey many of us have traveled in search of our Father’s unconditional love. Even though I was picked to be on a couple courts, until I truly knew Christ’s love for me, I still did not feel beautiful. I searched for acceptance in all the wrong places. Thankfully we have a suitor who pursues us with such love and when we finally know Him down in the deep place in our hearts, that’s when we shine with His beauty and radiance. Thank you for a beautiful post and for letting the radiant love of our Lord shine through you!
    Blessings and a Happy 4th to you,
    Bev

    • Such encouraging words, Bev. And an important reminder that even women who ARE pretty enough for the queen’s court can still feel less than. How our enemy blinds us to the beauty God showers over us! A blessed 4th to you, and thanks for sharing your own experience.

  2. Thank-you for the reminder. I need to hear this everyday right now as I deal with life. Thank-you.

    • You are absolutely chosen, Heather, and unconditionally loved by a God who knows His own and makes our calling clear: “You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9

  3. Liz,
    Thank you for always sharing just the right message at just the right time. I have been on a lifelong quest to feel and know I am beautiful. I catch glimpses, occasionally. My husband reminds me often that he thinks I’m beautiful. I just wish I could own it. Who knew that feeling beautiful would be so hard? We are surrounded by beautiful people! One day, God reminded me that “He doesn’t create junk and it’s insulting for me to feel anything but beautiful.” Ouch! So my quest continues. Thank you for giving us gentle and obvious reminders we so desperately need, to keep us on the path toward greatness. Blessings & love!!

    • It’s interesting, Lori, how the people we love most tell us we’re beautiful, yet we struggle to believe them. My hubby will tell you I’ve struggled with the exact same issue until God finally convinced me He knew what He was doing when He made me, and made each of us.

      I’ve often wondered what Sarai thought when her husband Abram said, “I know what a beautiful woman you are” (Genesis 12:11). Did she agree with him? Or say, “Oh, but Pharaoh’s wives are all more fair than I. Why, I couldn’t hold an oil lamp to any one of them!” LOL

  4. Love this Liz!! I so can relate…I seemed to take things a step further and didn’t even what that role of “queen” because I knew I didn’t deserve it. Your post is so powerful and I’m so grateful God has led me on a similar journey. I no longer read things like this and think, “Good for her.” Now I’ve experienced this freedom myself!! Thank you for sharing!!
    Total side note…I saw you at She Speaks in ’12 and still listen to the CD of your talk. My kids love the story of you swimming in the dead sea. I appreciate the laughs you provide, but am always grateful for the Truth you share!! Just last week my daughter left for camp and my husband’s last words to her – “Be Joy!!” Blessings to you!!

    • THRILLED that you are past the “good for her” stage, and have learned to say, “me too!” Wonderful.

      I LOVED my time at She Speaks in 2012. God’s presence was palpable all through that weekend. Looking forward to coming in 2015 and hugging everyone who will stand still long enough!

  5. Needed that this morning. More than you’ll ever know! Thankful for you and your ministry, sweet sister! 🙂

    • You’re kind to call my post a must read, Laura. As you know, such things start out as a must write! By committing our words to the screen, they speak to us first, and then to all who need to hear them. They won’t resonate with everyone. But if they resonate with someone, that’s enough for this woman. Happy Independence Day to you too!

  6. As an adopted child, I was always seeking a “daddy’s love.” But even adoption was a disappointment, for although my “dad” was a wonderful provider, I never remember caring hugs or snuggles or affirmations. Later in life, the words of Christ, “You have not chosen me, but I have chosen you” brought such a wonderful experience of feeling accepted – good enough! Thank you for your ministry Liz. You are often an encouragement to me.

  7. Beautifully written and oh so true. I am finally at a stage in my life where I see the beauty of each person as God made them, including myself.

    • Ah! What a wise soul you are, Naomi. Your words are worthy of a counted cross stitch sampler: “I see the beauty of each person as God made them, including myself.”

  8. Oh Liz…I never had the opportunity to be considered for anything like ‘queen’ because I was brought up SDA and we didn’t do proms/dances or anything remotely like them. Banquets..yup banquets. Yet I relate because I never thought of myself beautiful. Then I gained a lot of weight and hated myself even more. Then in Oct 2012 I began a journey to get healthy and I’ve lost almost 70 pounds…interesting I still look in the mirror and see the large person. It’s hard to wrap my head around the thinner person I am. I’ve lived a life full of rejection from an early age, and like you in my 20s looked for love in all the wrong places. I know God loves me, and I know He doesn’t make junk…I want to feel deep in my soul I am His beautiful daughter. Sometimes I do yet I battle it daily. Thank you for this post, encouraging to my soul. Blessings to you and yours.

  9. When I was reading it, I thought to myself is Liz writing it? I didn’t read the author’s name on top. Then after I read this BEAUTIFUL blog post, I looked up.
    I wasn’t surprised. Your voice is BEAUTIFUL, one of a kind. I can pick it our among many wonderful voices, but not as beautiful as yours.
    But you know that. You’re BEAUTIFUL! GOD BLESS YOUR SOUL!

  10. This resonates so deeply in me. My dad is autistic and so I grew up never experiencing a father’s loving, protective hug for his daughter.
    Just two days ago my mother told me that dad had given my sister a hug. Within minutes I was so jealous, ‘Why her? Why not me? I’ve always been the reliable, loving older daughter. ‘ (Yes, I too hear echoes of the gospel story of ‘The loving Father’)
    Minutes later I recognized that I was needy. I told my Heavenly Father how I was feeling and felt Him wrap His arms around me as I sobbed in His embrace.
    I am so amazed by God’s grace. He pursues me with a lover’s heart.
    Thank you for this reminder, Liz x

  11. Thank you for this wisdom and balm to my hurting self today. The truth is always the best medicine and this set my course aright. Our Father’s blessings to you and yours,

  12. Thank you. Was feeling earlier. No one called well one person. But generally always struggle with feeling rejected unnessesary, like why am i here if it matterss not to anyone. But hey..thanks.

  13. Hi Liz,
    That’s for your posts! I also wanted to be in the QOf C court. So consequently I followed the path of popularity through alcohol and “free love” because it was the 70’s. Right!? 30 years ago Jesus saved me from the all the lies. I’ll praise his name forever

  14. Thanks Liz, for the awesome reminder…sometimes when we are 62, and we look in the mirror,and the hair is bad, and the skin sags and a few other things go wrong that day…and the tears well up…we need to hear His Word again, as it lovingly makes everything better…
    Happy Independence Day to you!
    May you be blessed!

  15. I was never on a court & had a daddy who chastised me for being overweight and unattractive. Try as I might I never mastered hair styling and make-up. God blessed me with a husband who thinks I am beautiful inside and out, but I still struggle with feeling comfortable in my own skin. Thank you for this passage. It reminds me that I am enough, that in God’s eyes I am beautiful.

  16. Thank you Liz, for speaking God’s words of truth to those of us who struggle to feel beautiful (could that perhaps include ALL women?!?) Your words brought life & joy to me and helped me to laughingly say “Ta da”!! In the mirror. I needed to be reminded of Gods faithful love for me today. Thanks for bringing the message to me today

  17. I really appreciate what and how you said it. An interesting thing that I have been noticing is that, as I get older and my out word appearance changes or fades or whatever it does As time marches on, there are new aspects to your story that I encounter.

    It is very true that if we do not have Jesus Christ on the inside of us, and if we are not getting to know him better and better each week that we live, we can slip into the world’s values and the system of the young and the pretty being the only valuable people.

    Thanks again for sharing.

  18. Liz,

    I was never ever on any court nor did I want to be in the limelight. I never considered myself “beautiful”. People would say that I’m pretty, good looking, etc. But like most women I didn’t believe it. My hubby would and still tells me I’m beautiful and yet I couldn’t figure out what he saw in me. Years later I have come to realize what true beauty looks like. It is radiating God’s love to the world. It is caring for others & giving of yourself to help or pray for others.

    Thanks for the encouragement Liz–Happy 4th!~

  19. This was very authentic and transformative for those of us who struggle with being “His beauty”. I had to learn the hard way that just because I was told that I had outer beauty, it didnt matter when I felt ugly on the inside. I will share this with my pre-teen daughter who needs this truth to be deposited deep in her spirit. Blessings to you Liz!

  20. Sweet words Liz and so true. My wanting to be picked wasn’t a beauty pageant, but I still wanted to be picked. And never was. In the end, I learned I was chosen by a loving God who picked me long before I knew it. His love radiates in me now. Thank you for sharing.

  21. Liz,
    Thanks for sharing about how God gives us a freedom we could never experience without Him…and I think what your dad said was so sweet…blessings 🙂 I’m learning day by day to walk in that freedom…a process.

  22. No where near pageant material. I was a bookworm and a misfit when we moved from PA to Dallas (yes, from a whole beautiful state to a city). I was 11, entering 7th grade and at a school where kids wore uniforms so they couldn’t compete with expensive clothes (instead, when old enough they drove expensive cars!) and yet my books carried me to different worlds. It took a while before I went to a party at my mom’s urging without my book and realized that people were walking books waiting to be read.
    Strangers have told me I have a great smile. Odd.
    I think I have beautiful expressive (Greek) eyes and I wear glasses to hide them a bit. Just saying.
    But the whole picture isn’t beautiful unless I’m loving Jesus.
    I realized when I took my baby to JC Penney photography and they pose you and tell mom to just keep smiling at the camera while they work to get baby smiling that the only way my smile wouldn’t look tired and canned was to look into that camera and tell Jesus how much I love him. Works!
    That big fat neck/double chin thing I never see except in pictures? Ugh! Well maybe the smile will be more important.
    Thanks for writing this, Liz. We can all choose what to look at, who to love, and what to thank God for. I needed the reminder.

  23. It’s so refreshing to hear a Christian role model talk about beauty from a biblical perspective. The world has done an excellent job enslaving women to the idea that they’ll never have value unless they look perfect, meanwhile, the definition of perfection is constantly changing.

    Christians should be at the forefront of the size acceptance/fat acceptance movement, which asserts that every person is deserving of respect and compassion, no matter their size, yet Christians are some of the most fat-phobic people I’ve encountered. Thank you, Ms Higgs, for the reminder that appearance is not indicative of spiritual condition.

    Similarly, Christians don’t need to make health their idol, because we have no need to fear death. In fact, God is shown greatest when we are weakest.

  24. Trying to tell our daughters they are beautiful just the way they are, then not believing it for ourselves, is troubling. Thanks for the reminder. If we believe it, our daughters are more apt to as well!

  25. Beautiful piece from a Beautiful heart. I want to be fed by such powerful pieces that constantly remind me of my purpose in life.

  26. Liz,
    I was one of those who was never chosen for anything. It didn’t bother me as I never expected to be picked. I had issues and in school being different was pretty much a guarantee that popularity would pass you by. After I graduated from high school and moved from my small town to a much larger city I was amazed – I made friends and people seemed to actually like me. But the most important thing is that I was chosen by God – the Creator of Everything! He knows my name. He knows me inside and out and loves me anyway. When I read my Bible, the God on the pages, the Savior on the pages, the Holy Spirit on the pages actually knows me! This is almost too incredible to be true.
    We all seek approval from others, but I have learned that it is not the most important thing in life. I strive to be the best me I can as God made me as I am. He gave me my specific talents and He has a plan for my life. I want to do what He would have me do.
    I enjoyed reading your article. I think most women can relate to it. We all want to be pretty and to be accepted and have friends. Trouble is, our society places such an emphasis on being pretty, thin and seemingly perfect. They look on the outside but God looks upon our hearts. We need to spread the message of God’s love for us. It is so much more important than looks or accolades. Thank you for your wonderful message. 🙂