Lucy Mills
About the Author

Lucy is a freelance writer from the UK. Her first book is out this year! She loves discovering kindred spirits on her journey through life.

(in)side DaySpring: things we love
& you will too!
Find more at
(in)side DaySpring:
things we love
& you will too!
Find more at
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Reader Interactions


  1. Ah Lucy, I think if we are honest we all struggle with this, sometimes often. As for those who have ‘goodness on tap’, sometimes I wonder if some of that is their gifting, how God wired them and therefore it comes more naturally and easier to them. It doesn’t take away the command for the rest of us to be compassionate and us then depending on the Holy Spirit to follow through and do it, but possibly it can quiet the voice that accuses us of not being caring. After all, we have the Holy Spirit in us, so we care!

    I wonder if those ‘beautiful people’ that exude compassion might look at others, like you and me, that naturally flow in our giftings that are different than theirs and wonder how we do it so naturally.

    Good words for the start of my day! Thank you!

  2. This is such a good reminder to us all. For me- it’s easy to get caught up in my happy little world and extend that warm fuzzy kindness to the smiling people at church that I may not know but we all share that comraderie and curteois respect. But how about the rude cashier at Walmart who couldn’t give a rat’s tail that I am even in line and smiled at her……how rude. I grow indignant. Or how about the unexpectedly rude team member at Chick-fil-a who let me know by the glare that it wasn’t her “pleasure” to serve me. My natural inclination is to go rectify this “injustice” by tattling to a manager because after all is that what their company wants to reflect. But the Lord has taught me that these people are the “least of these” with hurts and wounds and hardness that needs Jesus. They may not live under a bridge or in the slums of Calcutta but who knows what spiritual desolation they are trying to get through. The grace of a smile and lack of offense may be just the kind of offering Jesus is asking of me to give to others today.

    • Oh, you are so right – the challenge is to be full of grace where we do not find it…to be kind where others are not takes our call to care one step further. I’m so glad God doesn’t leave us alone but gives us Holy Spirit help!

    • Thank you for your beautiful honesty ! I thought it was only me who felt apathetic, and feel prompted to ask G_d to circumcise my heart, that it may be of flesh, vulnerable, and willing to be used and perhaps even abused for His purpose and Glory. All of my righteousness is nothing, and to behold the Suffering Servant of Isaiah 53, and how His Majesty was marred and disfigured as the sinful world took its toll, I came across a devotional entitled “Radical Christianity”, (from biblegateway. com, I believe) I pray that everyone heals by His stripes, and mounts up on wings of eagles. He is Love, and He is Risen ! ~ Love, Lee from Seattle

  3. Wow, this was so timely. I just started the Beth Moore study ” Living Beyond Yourself” about fruits of the spirit. I think God blessed us with different attributes, and some come much easily than others. Kindness seems to come easily to me, most of the time, but self-control and joy, now that’s another story. I am praying that God will teach me why each one is of importance to him, after all our goal is to become more like him, and I believe that is a journey we will take until we reach our heavenly home.

    • Self-control is one I struggle with, too…and at the moment I keep being reminded that joy – the joy of the Lord – is the source of my strength. You’re right that some things come more naturally…it’s great we can learn from each other on that journey.

  4. O dear, I’ve been here as well. It’s bothering not being able to love … as love is the only answer. Love your neighbour as yourself.
    I think I’ll always have this loving and caring heart for those whom I love and are close to my heart. This is always a me that can be counted on. I love to love and when I don’t I know I need to turn towards a Holy God and turn from the darkness I’m facing. Lack of love. Waxed cold. Better not to love than to sit on the fence and feel nothing at all.
    I got down from that seat though it was safe and comfortable as there’s no commitment and no responsibilities. No feeling.
    I got off and tried …. think trying is always the better option.
    I don’t suppose there’s any right formula but trying is always a good option, I suppose.
    I dunno. I dunno really but it’s what I do.
    And care and love.
    Love is the only option. Love like JESUS.

  5. I think lots of people know the experiences and feelings you describe. I have certainly been there – lots of times. It strikes me that caring and compassion require energy and sometimes we will simply not have the energy. We really can get too tired and need to be kind to ourselves. We can expect more of ourselves at such times than perhaps God does. In that state I’m thinking that the most important thing to do is to allow ourselves to receive love and compassion, from God and from others – not always easy if your default mode is giving.

    • Nancy – oh yes, I agree. Tiredness takes so much from us. We need to learn to receive…to be comforted so that we can comfort others.

  6. Dear Lucy,

    I praise God for your transparency and strength to “cry out”. This reminds me of a scripture, “God is a Spirit, and they must worship Him in Spirit and in Truth”. Truth moves the heart of God, and your dependence on Him to pray for what you need (that He caused you to desire) is all He desires of His children. Now, wait and see the great BIG transformation He will make in you. GET READY! GET READY! GET READY!

  7. I relate much to this…truly some of it is the sheer possibility of inundation through how we can instantly know of the deepest pain of the world…it is so often too much & we need some level of coping mechanism but ultimately to seek the Spirit give what is possible as a discipline of the heart. For me it is often a picture prayer where I see the Lord pouring His love & presence into the situation. I also actively trust Him to nudge me to more when it is His will…

  8. Interesting perhaps its not that big to start with – I am like this on many days myself when I wake in much pain – to me personally its all a matter of going to God and asking Him to help me as I attempt to reach out to others in their time of need and mot allow my own burdens to consume me as Jesus is the burden bearer – only asks us to reach out with a heart of compassion and then I am sure he steps in and takes over as we lift another’s burden and offer it up to him.

  9. My eyes are moist as I realise how yet again Father God has used someone to speak right into my heart. I have been saying for some time “I WANT TO BE KIND, WHY CAN’T I BE KIND? WE ARE COMMANDED TO BE KIND’ etc. There are issues in my life and lots of healing has happened and more is needed, but this last New Year I wanted to BE KIND, to care, to trust (one of my issues) and not to feel like I am not making enough effort.
    There have been moments when I have felt I have actually made some progress, but also periods where I have felt I will NEVER get it right.
    How comforting it is to hear someone put into words what I have felt. And how encouraging to realise that someone else is also on this hard, steep road, but also to know that with the help of the Holy Spirit we WILL get there.
    Thank you – and se you at the top 🙂

  10. Thank you for writing so honestly! I agree with you and others that I often feel I just don’t have any more energy for compassion. I feel tired so much of the time.

    I have vague recollection though of a speaker at my CU (and that’s at least 20 years ago so please forgive the vagueness) talking about our feelings being like a caravan and our will being like a landrover. Life works better if the one with a steering wheel is in the front.

    So I try to just *choose* compassion, (and faith and patience for that matter). and hope that my feelings will line up behind when they wake up and remember where they are 🙂 …and sometimes they do.

  11. Lucy,

    You hit the nail on the head. I find myself lacking compassion and caring. I guess it’s because I work in the medical field and am around to much “crap”. Then suddenly God will prick my heart and allow me to be a bit more caring and prayerful.

    I never thought about working to obtain the fruits of the spirit. I assumed God would just give them to me and I would always have them. 🙂 I should realize that the evil one will try his best to take away any and all fruits that God is bestowing. Work hard to keep and maintain them I will.

    Blessings 🙂

  12. Oh Lucy, your words have struck a nerve in me! Thank you for your boldness to publish these words. God knows, He already did and His tenderness towards us never fails even when we don’t fell a shred of tenderness ourselves. May God bless you sister.

    • “His tenderness towards us never fails even when we don’t fell a shred of tenderness ourselves”. I love that! May God bless you, too!