Kristen Welch
About the Author

Kristen writes at her parenting blog, We Are THAT Family and is author of Rhinestone Jesus: Saying Yes to God When Safe Sparkly Faith is No Longer Enough and founder of The Mercy House. Follow Kristen on twitter as @WeareTHATfamily.

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things we love
& you will too!
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Reader Interactions


  1. Kristen, you hit my nerve!
    I’m actually in some different and hard times on learning something what I don’t understand. Struggeling with two coworkers who really act strange to me. It’s hard but I try to see what Christ is holding for me, teaching me softly to do His will!
    Thanks so much!

  2. Stopped by this morning because the pain is deep and seemingly too complicated. Thank you for making the choice clear!

    We have a couple choices: we can talk about how much we hurt or pretend we don’t at all. Or we can let Jesus massage the pain away

  3. “When Christ pushes on our vulnerable places–the valley of depression, the abiding loneliness, the dark fear, the need to control–it actually creates a deeper intimacy with Him.” So good! Thank you for the reminder that often times the pain is ultimately for our good. Beautiful words.

  4. Thank you for sharing. It is exactly what I need to hear this week. God brought the following Scripture to mind yesterday when a nerve was being pressed on particularly hard and the pain went deep.

    “Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:14-16

  5. Thank you for the encouraging words! I have been in pain for some time and it’s an amazing reminder he can create something beautiful from what we are going though.

  6. “We have a couple choices: we can talk about how much we hurt or pretend we don’t at all. Or we can let Jesus massage the pain away and ultimately allow our weakness to make us stronger.”

    Spot on.

    Thank you for sharing.

  7. Thank you Kristen, for this reminder. What an incredible imagery of massaging the soreness of hurt by Christ. Could it possibly make any more sense this? Yes, lean on Him and let Him press it out.

  8. You could not have put it in a more clearer way. I totally agree. Transparency takes us to places that hurt and when everyone knows, we ourselves know as well and then, one day, a long time from today, it gets that much better.

  9. Kristen. This is so good. Thank you for your heart & yielding to The Lord in sharing. Walking this in my life now & have been for 2 years. Also my One Word is Persevere. So goes together to follow through with action with what God says to do even if it’s painful. He is our Father & we be His kids.

  10. Thank you, Kristen. Just got some sad news yesterday about one of the kids on my school bus. Other issues going on within my family, and I just told my friend that it was just so painful I had to give it all to God..I cried all the way through your post. Thank you.

  11. I have endured and “lived” with the pain and sorrow of the sudden death of my husband for 15 months. I have days when I think I am healing finally. Then suddenly it all comes crashing down and my heart shatters all over again. I am so tired of this sorrow over and over. Any wisdom out there?

  12. I am dealing with heart-wrenching sorrow right now (have been for a long time) so this post was very timely for me. Thank you for the reminder.

  13. “The reality is Jesus pushes on the tender places for our good.”

    Love this. Praying that He pushes on our tender places so that we all draw closer to Him. Reminds me of the Laura Story song, “Blessings.” His blessings often come through hardships. I love the chorus –

    ‘Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops
    What if Your healing comes through tears
    What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near
    What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

  14. While I do strongly believe God uses difficult trials to draw us to Him, and I am so grateful He can bring good out of bad situations, I am also thankful that isn’t the only way we we will find ourselves drawing closer to God. Sometimes it is as simple as desiring God and loving Him because He first loved us. I want to be found drawing close in the good times and in the hard times because I am so thankful for His faithfulness to me throughout my life which has been filled with both!

  15. This reminded me of what I wrote for a Five Minute Friday with Lisa Jo a long time ago…
    That deep thrumming…no, thrumming sounds too musical…and aching just hurts. It needs rubbing and warmth. Maybe some ice, but , oh, how an ache yearns for warmth. Ache. It’s what ails many of us. It just doesn’t feel good. Not that critical, can’t ignore, sharp “OUCH!” but that “whenever I stop it is there” hurt. Rumbling. That is a better word. Droning. Relentless. No ups or downs, just downs and downers. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being no pain and 10 being the worst pain ever, how would you rate your pain? Ow. Ow. Ow. Just won’t go away. And now I have to give it a number??? Pretty darn. Enough.
    Can you help? Rub it gently. Massage it. Deeper, but don’t make me cry. Well, maybe just a little. Ouch, that hurts, but somehow that is making it better.
    Sometimes our aching needs time to heal. Sometimes our aching needs a crutch. Sometimes our aching needs a hand to hold. And sometimes our aching needs to be pressed and manipulated – the knots worked out. And somehow, the bruised tenderness afterward hurts, but doesn’t ache … not that deep rumbling . Working at it sometimes brings it up from the depths to where it can heal.

  16. I’m always amazed by how much God loves me when I’m going through hard stuff and He leads me to things like this that encourage me so much. This massage hurts, but I’m looking forward to the relief that comes afterward. Thanks so much for sharing this!

  17. I am encouraged as I find the pain in my body and in my spirit are necessary to alert me to the need of the Lord Jesus. He alone can use the pain in my heart to draw me into His presence. I was touched by the last phrase in your writing, “When He presses in, lean into Him. He can redeem our pain and create something beautiful from it.”

  18. Trudie, just wanted to let you know how sorry I am about your husband. How utterly devastating. While I’ve not lost a spouse, I am familiar with loosing family members. I would encourage you to kind to yourself during this grieving process. Take one step or half step at a time. Remember, “baby steps” count. Climb into your Heavenly Father’s lap and He will comfort your hurts away. And because He knows your pain, He allows you to sit on His lap for as long as you need to. When you climb down, you’ll never be the same. He loves you, Trudie. Am praising God in advance for mending your heart and restoring your strength and peace. God Bless!