we’re five on a couch, eating cookies. my husband will not be pleased. i will have to vacuum, yet again. (i vacuum constantly.) but food is one thing i try not to have many rules about. it makes me happy just to see my children eat.
because once upon a time, i didn’t. i stopped eating when i was nine years old, a shy home-schooled pastor’s daughter, and for four years i was given blood tests and cod liver oil and time-outs and counseling sessions, but all i wanted was love.
i think that’s all any child wants, and i’m learning to bend low and gaze into their old souls. my two biological sons, and two foster. to hold them close while the dust of heaven rubs onto mine because they’re fresh from the other side.
this is not to say i don’t want to rub off on them as well. after all, i’ve been to the other side too. the side which whispers lies into a child’s ears and makes her believe she is less than lovable. the side that makes 80 percent of eight-year-old girls diet. the side which kept me from hugging my parents for two years. (i cling to my boys because they’re flesh of my flesh.)
but there’s going to come a time. there always comes a time, when a mother has to go. not spiritually, but physically. you cannot keep a mother from praying.
and my mother never stopped praying. she may have made mistakes. my father, too, and heaven knows i did. but my parents bent low on their knees morning, noon and night and begged the high heavens to save their little girl, and the nurses marveled at my hypothermic body. i was 13 years old and 60 pounds and dying, but not dead, and i’d seen a vision of a woman running, healthy and strong and muscular and her hair wasn’t falling out and her nails weren’t cracking and i knew: this was no way to live. this was hell.
there are days now when all i can do is pray, with four boys ages four and under. days when i crawl under the coffee-table and wait for the house to fall down on top of us for the way they’re throwing toys down the stairs and pulling toilet paper off the roll and spilling milk on the carpets. days when i just wait for this day to be over. but you can still pray from under a coffee table. you can still pray when your world is falling apart. in fact, that’s pretty much the only thing you can do.
the kids are done with their cookies now, and it’s chaos again, them jumping on the couch and fighting over toys and begging me to read them a story. and i’m looking for that coffee table.
but for a moment, while they ate, it was quiet. for a moment, they were absorbed in how good the cookie tasted, their eyes round with delight, their mouths chewing, and these are the moments that keep a mother believing.
these moments in which her children eat. these moments in which her family is fed.
this week i’m giving away TWO copies of my new book, Chasing Silhouettes: How to Help a Loved One Battling an Eating Disorder. to win a copy for yourself, for your church, for your school library or for the family down the street, please leave a comment below telling me ONE THING YOUR MOTHER DID RIGHT.
winners will be chosen friday.
if you need the book now, please click here.
for endorsements, sample chapters, and the book trailer, go here (or watch trailer below).
By Emily, www.emilywierenga.comLeave a Comment
One thing my mom did right was encourage me to stay in the classes I was in in high school and not drop down to easier ones when I got freaked out at the beginning of every trimester. If I’d done whatever I wanted I probably would have been in remedial classes by the end of high school because I was so terrified of not doing well in the classes I was in that I seriously considered dropping most of them every trimester. I am glad I stayed, because I ended up doing relatively well in every honors class I took, and that helped me last year, my first year in college, to recognize that the class may seem impossible now, but if I ever want to graduate I’ll have to take it, and I probably will make it through just fine.
my mother encouraged me greatly in my education too, friend. thank you for sharing. e.
My mom was often affectionate and always said I love you.
what incredible qualities, janet. you can’t go wrong with those 🙂 e.
Yes…prayer is our most powerful parenting tool…a tool that transforms our hearts as well as moves God’s….xoxoxo
Amen, Ro 🙂
on how our mothers save us | says
[…] at incourage again today, friends… join me HERE for the rest of this post? thank you for […]
My mother always was our biggest defender, always championed our cause, always took our side.
wow kalyn. with a mother like that, you don’t have to be afraid of anything, really, knowing she’ll always have your back.
Abigail Snyder says
My mom did a lot of things right. The one that comes to mind first is simply disciplining us and providing a structured routine. Despite being homeschooled, we were required to wake up at 6 a.m., do a daily chore list, and start school. Through this, I learned motivation, rising early, responsibility, and, of course, the skills to do my own laundry, prepare meals, and clean efficiently. Even better, when I disobeyed or lied or acted disrespectfully, I was punished. And I learned that ideas and actions have consequences. I look around at the sophomores in my high school classroom and shake my head in dismay at the knowledge that only about 20% of them have any idea what chores, discipline, or hard work mean. Much less that their actions might have consequences. Thanks mom!
wow abigail it sounds like you had an amazing, caring mother. you are blessed! thank you for sharing. e.
Rachel York says
My Mother always kept an open, honest line of communication with me. I always knew I could talk to her about my friends, boys, and just teenage life. Granted, I still got disciplined for bad decisions and behavior, but it was great to have someone I could go to with my problems. Even if all I did was vent about my immature class mates, or my distaste for how my best friend was acting. Most of my friends didn’t have that with their mothers. In fact, some of them used my Mom to talk to also. I greatly relied upon her attentive ears. That is why to this day she is not only my Mother, but one of my closest friends.
wow, this is so huge, rachel, to have a mother that you felt you could talk to. what a blessing. thank you for sharing! e.
My mom always believed in my writing, and encouraged me to do it.
this is HUGE friend. huge. something i always wanted from my mother. i am happy for you. e.
Funny,we can think of all the things our parents did wrong, but to stop and think of what they did right, that requires a little more depth…. Mom always prayed and subjected herself to dad’s authority…. She interceded for us to dad and to God too!! Having a mother who always prayed for me and continues to do so today has been the biggest blessing a child can ever have…. My life is not free of problems but momma showed me the key…. She showed me how to pray!!!! Love my mom!!!
submitting herself to your father’s authority–what a testimony. and yes, prayer is huge, isn’t it? bless you jules. thank you for sharing. e.
Nikki Shoemaker says
My mother always encouraged us to love the “unlovely” and to have compassion for “the least of these”.
i love this nikki. this is Jesus in a nutshell. or in your mother, rather. 🙂 bless you, e.
My mom had meals ready for a family dinner every night
that is really huge, alison, especially in today’s culture. thank you for sharing! e.
I had a rough childhood. I always knew my father loved me but I longed for the same from my mother. But the one thing she did do for me is she chose to have me instead of what she really wanted to do. For that I honored her until the day she died.
debbie, this brings me nearly to tears. what a sacrifice, on your mother’s part, but also on yours, to be able to see it for the gift that it was. bless you. e.
My mom was a great example of a Christian woman, getting up early every morning to spend time with God.
i love this alison. this getting up early example. now that i’m a mother i realize what a huge sacrifice that is (when sleep is so precious). bless you, e.
April LeCureux says
My mom always supports me in everything I do. She always has and I know she always will.
this is so rare and so beautiful, april, this kind of love. bless you, e.
Mary M says
My mother supported me when I was rejected for not being pretty enough or being too intelligent. She encouraged me to use my God-given intelligence for good and to not listen to those who would put me down.
oh mary. this makes me want to cry. i’m so sorry for the pain you endured, but so glad you had your mother through it all. bless you, e.
Even when she didn’t like what I had done…I knew she loved me…unconditionally. She’s been in Heaven over 18 years and is missed everyday!
oh kelly, this unconditional love is something pretty special. i’m so sorry for your loss. thank you for sharing here. e.
Mom came to every one of my performances, every single one (even matinees!). She was always my biggest cheerleader through high school and college. There were a lot of other things she did well, but this was the one she did specifically for only me (not my 5 other siblings).
it’s so nice to have things that our parents do just for us, isn’t it? it really shows that they’re taking the time to tell us, i love you. bless you heidi. e.
Danielle Christy says
My mom always talked to me, about everything in my life. Sometimes she came off a little nosy but I know now that she really cared about me and my life and that means the world to me now, not only still as her daughter but as a mom myself.
this is something i always longed for from my mum, danielle. i wish she had been a little more nosy 🙂 and i know what you mean about not appreciating those kinds of things until later on. bless you, e.
One thing my mom did right is speak up when she noticed disfunction in our family. She was rarely listened to, and sometimes mocked because no-one wanted to face anything or change anything. But she was almost always right in her observations. I see the love she showed in speaking up even though she knew it would not be received well and she might be personally attacked. I really respect her opinions about things now, as do the other members of our family.
this means so much, sarah, as this is something i do within my own family–and yes, i’m rarely listened to, also. 🙂 but i appreciate you saying that you saw love in her doing this. bless you. e.
You cannot know what your appreciation of your mother did for ME, a mom! If you are interested, you can scroll down to Posts 90, 91, 92. Post 92 especially because I wrote a bit there to thank you, dear sister! And I echo what EmilyW said to you, too!:-)
In love and thankfulness, D
The one thing my mother did right was show me how to survive. She had been through many challenges and difficulties in her life, but she kept her faith and the love of her Lord Jesus Christ to sustain her…no matter how hard life would get.
survival is huge, maureen. and i love how it was the Lord who sustained her. thank you for sharing! e.
My mom is absolutely beautiful. Back when I was a kid and I was emotional about absolutely everything, I remember her sitting me down when I was crying, and looking me in the face and saying “honey, you have 5 minutes to cry or yell or scream or whatever… and when you’re done with that, you can either come back here and tell me what’s going on, or you can stop crying.”
It sounds harsh to some people. But… it helped me realize that I get to decide when to give weight to my emotions, and how that looks. That my emotions don’t control my life. It was probably one of the single most impactful moments of my life.
wow, i love how she gave you the tools with which to deal with your emotions. thank you so much for sharing. e.
My Mom taught me the value of money. In high school I received an allowance that I used for clothing, entertainment, and anything special. It has really helped me to determine needs and wants.
i received this allowance too, kim! i found it incredibly helpful. bless you, e.
Karen W says
Despite the arguments and hard times my mother stayed married to my dad. Neither have a relationship with the Lord but after over 50 years of marriage they still have a relationship with each other! She loves me the best she knows how and that is better than no love at all.
wow that is an incredible legacy, karen. i don’t know how they do it without the Lord, but that is amazing! bless you. thank you so much for sharing. e.
One thing that my mom did right was let us go to church on the church bus each Sunday. She would wake us up in time, feed us breakfast, make sure we were dressed and waiting outside for the church bus to come. I’m so glad that she let us go!
what a beautiful memory, beth. thank you so much for sharing. bless you, e.
My mother set a good example in her eating and exercise. She didn’t talk about it, but she had a whole, healthy lifestyle.
as a recovering/ed anorexic, friend, this speaks volumes to me. what a blessing, to have a mother who modeled health and confidence for you. e.
Susie Daggett says
My mom loved us
what a gift, susie!
Debbie Mass says
She loved me when I was unloveable and was always there for me even when I deserved the worst!
wow. this reminds me of the prodigal son story. a true Christ-like mother.
Laura K says
My mom made sure we grew up in the church, and that our lives reflected Christ’s love. I can’t ask for more, and I hope I do the same for my 3! 🙂
oh laura, that is huge! and i’m sure you will… bless you, e.
My mother always said she’d be praying for me when I went to the dentist. I hated going to the dentist because it always hurt a lot!
oh ann this is so very sweet. what a thoughtful mother!
My mother did many things right, too. One thing that comes to mind in answer to this question right at this moment, however, is how she always honored her mother and her father. My grandfather died when I was young but my grandmother lived to be 94 and she and my mother always had a grand time together. They would talk into the wee hours when visiting one another. I never knew my other grandparents so this relationship taught me alot about family life. Now that I am a new grandmother, I think I will cherish the remembrance of my mother’s relationship with her mother all the more as my daughter and I grow in this new phase of our relationship.
this honoring of mother and father is so rare and so biblical. what a huge impact she had, just by doing this. thank you for sharing this story! e.
My Mom made mistakes, and I’m sure I’ll make even more than she did. But I never, ever doubted that she loved me. Not once did I hear her say that she couldn’t wait for school to start so that she wouldn’t have to deal with having us at home. I may have felt unloved and unwanted by many people, but never my Mom.
teish, as a mother, this is so encouraging to hear. because i know my kids know i love them. and i know that i make mistakes too. so as long as they remember love, hopefully it will help cover over a multitude of sins…
carol l says
Mother has always been the gentle soul of our family – rarely did I see her angry. Conversely, she had a way of making us feel lower than low, when she – very calmly and quietly – explained how much we had disappointed her. Both my brother and I have relied on her to be the foundation for our family as our dad was, more often than not, “there” for us. She continues to be the ‘go-to’ for us as well as her subsequent stepchildren, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. They all know that they can rely on “Nannaw”.
she sounds like the cornerstone, the rock, of your family. a pillar of strength. beautiful.
My mom always told me I was strong enough to take care of myself and get through any situation. I still hear her telling me that as life became complex and challenging. Thankful for her support
her belief in you is inspiring, jessica. thank you for sharing! e.
My mother by her life taught us to share with the poor, love the least of these and the unlovely (although we found them very lovely and to be great friends), and to keep our focus on Him. She did all of this by what she did and said as she walked through life as a single mom. And she never drew attention to what she did. We found out some of this after she died.
oh linda. this is so, so powerful. your mother was an incredibly strong and humble lady. what a testimony she leaves behind her.
Shari Grayczyk says
My mom prayed and hounded heaven on her children’s behalf. She continues to do so, along with hounding heaven on behalf of her son and daughter in laws, grandchildren, children and neighbors, etc.
“hounded heaven.” LOVE this shari. i pray i can be this kind of prayer warrior for my family. thank you, e.
Jane Davis says
My Mom never failed to tell me how smart I am. The one thing I never doubted was my intellect, thanks to Mom.
that is wonderful, jane. it’s so important to know our mothers believe in us. e.
Jennie Walker Knoot says
My mother turned any tiny accomplishment into an excuse to celebrate her children – she made us feel so special for being who we were.
LOVE this jennie. this inspires me to keep noticing the “small” things my children do (you know, it comes pretty natural when they are small. every new accomplishment always seems like such a big deal, because they’re so incredibly precious and new to this life… everything’s a first for them!)
Jane Davis says
My Mom never failed to tell me how smart I am.
My mom loves to feed us–good, yummy, home-cooked food.
this is such a beautiful mother trait! we often associate wholesome, warm, home-cooked meals with maternity and love… thank you for sharing amy!
she laughed with me, and said sorry to me. I miss her
laughing with you and saying sorry to you–these are HUGE. these are things i wish i could have shared with my mum when i was young. i’m so sorry for your loss, sweet anna. your mom sounds like she was a wonderful woman who loved you dearly. e.
I want to win this so very badly! I wasnt raised by my mother, and that could explain alot. I am a mother myself, and, I cannot seem to find sensitivity to my children, I want to, but, I guess I dont know how.
Bless your heart! I don’t have or know an easy, fast answer, but your desire is right to want to show sensitivity to your children! God’s Word says in Ps 34, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and HE WILL give you the desires of your heart.” Go to Him, make HIM your delight, seek Him and ask Him to heal and help your broken places so that you can allow the love and compassion of Jesus Christ to live and flow through you for your children and others. To pour into your heart, HIS LOVE, for we just don’t have that on our own. You can trust Him, Darla, for for the Lord has been, is, and will be your Father AND your Mother when everyone else has deserted you. His grace is sufficient for you, dear one! He loves you and your children SO! And His love NEVER fails.
deeb, i love this answer. thank you for reaching out to darla in this loving way. bless you, e.
dear darla, my heart aches for you. how i hope you can win this. otherwise, it’s only $10 on amazon.com, and you can also ask your local bookstore or library to order it in for you. in the meantime, please know i’m praying for you. something that helps me is to ask God to fill me with HIS love for my children. to fill me with HIS sensitivity. i pray he fills you to overflowing. the fact that you CARE speaks volumes. if you ever want to talk, my email is firstname.lastname@example.org. blessings, e.
My momma says ‘i love you’ every five minutes it seems like. She drove me crazy with it as a teen but now it’s just who she is and how she loves. And none of us ever wondered if she did love us.
oh brittany. this is such a wonderful “problem” to have 🙂 as someone who didn’t have a lot of verbal affirmation growing up, i totally understand why your mother does this. i tell my sons i love them all the time, just because i want so desperately for them to know it. bless you!
The one thing I know my Mom did right and passed on to eight daughters was a legacy to stand and to be resilient, even in the midst of pain and rejection. Sometimes the lessons learned were harsh for her and admittedly for most of us…now that she is gone… and we’ve all become older and hopefully wiser, we now talk about how she still loved..in spite of. Most of us believed we wouldn’t choose her path in our own relationships, unfortunately, most of us failed, but in spite of..we’re still standing and still loving. Thank you, Mama.
wow mary, what a story… and eight daughters? wow. what a legacy. our mothers teach us the hard things, and sometimes the hard way. i love how you still love/d her, in spite of the painful times. bless you, e.
Emily you tell such a sweet story of redemption and healing. I love hearing how you share the love you were given. It flows through you to your boys. And some of it spills over on to me. Love this,
thank you friend. you are such an incredible blessing to me. so much love, e.
Emily, your words always such words of life. Thank you, friend. My mama taught me the power of listening to people’s stories, of noticing the small things, of considering how the other might feel. She taught me my dreams and feelings were important. Jesus bless and keep you in this journey, Emily. You are trailblazing in some mighty ways. Sending much love.
ashley, you don’t know how your words breathe life into me today. thank you friend. i love how you are continuing on your mother’s gift for hearing others stories, and being sensitive to their needs. bless you. e.
I want to tell you how much I needed to be reminded by your posts…that I did some things right…as somehow my adult son seems to have believed some lies, has some wrong assumptions, and perhaps exaggerations of how I have failed or wronged him. I don’t know what they are, but have experienced his mocking, harshness, etc. It’s as if he has rejected solid biblcal truths that he was raised with.
I am in the midst of trying to write him a letter to tell him of my love and ask how I have hurt, offended, or disappointed him and am hoping he will be open to share with me, even though it may be very painful. So I would appreciate your prayers for my expression to him, his heart to be prepared, and real peace between us.
My mom?:-) She was a very wounded person for much of her life, but she always tried to serve us in the best way she knew how. At home with my dad, when I had my own home and family and she would visit, blessing and loving us and my kids in her zany and practical ways. And the biggest thing she did right was finally believe on Christ and be saved about 10 years before she died. Oh, it made such a difference in her life and ours! Glory to God, I will see her again!
oh deeb. what a hard time for you. i will definitely be praying for you. “Lord Jesus, I ask that you guide Deeb in her words as she writes her son a letter. Oh Lord, you know what he needs to hear. You know where he’s at, and how he’s hurting. We ask for you to minister in your son’s name, for you to speak life and love and redemption and forgiveness into his heart. Thank you God that you are all powerful and all knowing. Please bless Deeb with peace as she reaches out to her son; help her not to give up. To never give up. In Jesus’ name, Amen.” so much love, friend. please keep me posted.
Thank you so much, Emily! First of all, for what you shared yesterday in your blog; it was totally the Lord who brought me to it and the truth & encouragement you shared! Especially about the prayers of your parents and so much more! Also thank you for YOUR prayer above! I was hoping someone would reply or pray! I kept this page up from yesterday to see if there were any words of wisdom or love…
How blessed and reaffirmed I also was when I read Sarah’s words above who wrote that her mom “did right” by speaking up when there was dysfunction, but was not usually heeded or appreciated by the truth in love, (even when it played out to be true). So has it been with me over many years. Her testimony reinforced my resolve to write that letter. Now I feel I need to wait for God’s best timing. I’m having a hard time with that, as I want to do this ASAP, yet, do not sense a “go ahead” from the Lord…I thank all of you who commented in this column, for reminding me that indeed I have done a few things “right” in the Lord’s sight. With much love and gratitude to each of you!
I too had an eating disorder in grade school. It started in 8th grade and ran all the way through high school. The day I realized I needed help, I was sitting in my OB/GYN’s office with my mom after having had the millionth bone density test and estrogen test. My doctor looked me square in the eyes and said if I didn’t get myself together I would never be able to have children. I looked over to see my mom sobbing. The grief on her face made me realize I wasn’t just hurting myself, I was hurting the people who loved me most. From that day forward, my mom stood right by my side as I fought my way through my anorexia. She went to every meeting I had with counselors, she went with me to every single dietician visit, and she prayed with me every single day. And it’s because of her and God that I can proudly say that I am healthy and happy today. And as of November 27, 2012, we will be celebrating my beautiful little girl’s first birthday – and knowing I could give the gift of a grandchild to my mom, after so much damage to my body, is the biggest blessing of all.
Jessica… i have tears in my eyes. what an absolutely incredible story friend. i was told i probably wouldn’t be able to have children when I turned 13. how i would love to visit with you and have tea 🙂 thank you so much for sharing your heart with me today. bless you on this healing journey. e.
Sarah M says
One (of the many!) thing my mother did right was getting ‘out and about’ to interesting things on the weekends that would foster a life-long love of learning. She was a single mom who often worked overtime, but weekends were for road-trips to neat places, art & history museums, and bookstores. Things were very tight but she figured out to do these things cheaply (perhaps on ‘free days’?) and she never said “no” to a book.
what an amazing mother you have, sarah! to be strong enough, and energetic enough, to take care of herself in addition to her family, as a single mother… truly inspiring. bless you. e.
My mother taught me that if “the right one” came along, that things would just flow. I had a few bumpy relationships and she was right about them all!
i love this. my mum was right about my relationships too. i think it’s because she prayed so much for my future spouse…
Karlyn Hillman says
I love my mom so much! We aren’t anything alike. She is organized and good at math. I’m in total disorganization at all times and can barely add and subtract. One of the many things she did right was not give up on me. She prayed for me, was patient with me, and gave me advice even when I didn’t want to hear it.
karlyn, i can hear the love for your mom in the way you write about her. she sounds like my husband, who is not like me either… but we balance each other out well, and have a great relationship. bless you! e.
My mom never stopped praying for me because she never gave up.
i love this hope. prayer equals trust. beautiful.
One of many things my mom did right was raising two kids who love to read.
friend, i get this. my mum did too. i’m so grateful to her, for that.
My mom prayed on her knees, next to her bed every morning.
Us kids could spy her through a cracked bedroom door when we
were home from school.
See…she came to meet and know Jesus when she was 30 something,
and I was a teen. And I saw Jesus change my mom right…before…my….
oh jennifer, this is so, so beautiful. so beautiful. i love that you could see her praying through her bedroom door…
Southern Gal says
My mama has always invested time in her children and grandchildren and now great-grandchildren! She was always the willing one to play games with the kids, still is. My mama lost her younger brother when he was 23. She gave her life to Jesus after that. I then knew God was real. He changed her completely and it affected a change in everyone around her. And the best part is she’s still full of fun!
oh friend, your family inspires me so much. you’re all so close. it’s a holy thing.
Allison Glastad says
I always felt comfortable inviting friends over, whether it was last minute for lunch in the middle of the school day (we could leave campus) and I’d show up with 4 or 5 friends and be welcomed with open arms, or study sessions or slumber parties. We didn’t have a perfectly clean home, but we had a welcoming home. I realize now that she has the Spiritual Gift of Hospitality, and guess what? So do I.
i LOVE that spiritual genes pass down, as well as biological ones… this is such a cool testimony to that, allison. beautiful.
DEBBIE PETE says
She worked so I could attend Christian school even though she wasn’t saved.
wow debbie. what an incredible sacrifice… truly, even though she wasn’t saved, this was such a Christ-like thing for her to do for you. thank you for sharing! e.
Melissa O says
My mom came to my games/meets. She even co-coached my basketball team one year. I didn’t really appreciate it at the time, but looking back it shows me one of the many ways she was loving me.
funny, hey, how we don’t appreciate these things until years later? like all of those nights my dad helped me with homework… math in particular… thank you for reminding me of this, melissa. bless you, e.
Hiroko Hsieh says
My mom loved me in such a way that she made me feel special and I knew she trusted me. Her love and trust made me want to be good and loving. It wasn’t until I grew older that I realized that my self esteem was not based on what I was good at but my parents’ unconditional love that made me feel so special by just being myself.
hiroko, it is so good to see you here! i love this: “that my self-esteem was not based on what i was good at, but my parents’ unconditional love.” yes. this is powerful. thank you for sharing, friend. love and miss you. e.
To think for ourselves – be able to break the mold. I have a great mom!
to think for yourself is a huge gift… it shows confidence, character and a desire for truth. what a blessing!
Allison C. Lee says
My mom stalked me like a bloodhound when I was a rebellious teen…and she prayed. Because of these two things, I am still alive.
oh allison this is so beautiful. because i know i’ll do the same for my sons. i know i’ll stalk them. and i hope i’ll pray continuously for them. bless you, e.
The one thng I am now grateful to my mom for is her decision to give me up to my dad, who in turn gave me up to his mother. My grandmother took me to church three to four times a week and I finally realized why she needed to be there so much. She taught me how to be a Godly young lady. She never let me feel that I was unwanted. She was there for me until the day she passed away. One week after she passed, I went through all the things she left for me and the one thing that has stuck with me is her register in her checkbook. She was a faithful tither.
I have really learned a lot from two wonderful women.
jean, this is so incredibly moving. the sacrifices made by all of you, and the unconditional love which rooted you. thank you so much for sharing, friend. bless you, e.
My mom taught me to love learning. She went back to school when I was in the 5th grade and became an RN. I admire her desire to minister to the sick and support our family.
to go back to school is no easy feat–good for her! and my mum instilled in me a great love of learning too, for which i am grateful. thank you so much for sharing, friend! e.
Sharon O says
I love that picture. It is so cute and so ‘full of boys’… and you are doing a great job. Keep on and be encouraged. Taking ONE step at a time.
sharon, you are such a wonderful encouragement to me. thank you friend.
My mom has done many things right. Her dream was to stay home a raise my sister and I. Although, I know it was very difficult at times she did a really great job at being a supportive and loving parent. I appreciate her so much.
oh lesley, i can hear the love in your voice here. i’m so glad you have a good mother.
She would always listen when I was ready to talk.
such a gift, ruth, truly.
Mom taught us to respect people.
respect is huge. thank you for sharing liz! bless you, e.
my mom prayed and prayed and prayed thru many difficult times and she survived – and so showed me how to.
beautiful, annie. a praying mother is priceless… bless you, e.
My mom showed me how to pray showed me that prayer is first thing to do in all things. Showed me to go to God first. She showed me a mothers love always there for me. To respect others.
what an incredible mother, patty. what a blessing. thank you so much for sharing! e.
My mom sang us to sleep. She made up songs with verse after verse (different every time) about how much she loved us. She sings them now to my daughter, who knows that no matter what happens in the day, she goes to sleep wrapped in love.
oh kelley this is such a good idea, i might have to adopt it. bless you! e.
One thing my Mom did right was love. Love me, love my sisters, love my dad. Love my friends. Love her students. Love every kid in the high school, it seemed. And through her love, she taught me that the world is bigger than just me, and that even when I think I’m not doing it right, the fact that I’m doing something is better than nothing.
“she taught me that the world is bigger than just me.” love this lauren. thank you so much for sharing!
She taught me to follow Jesus and to always pray .. pray and pray, especially now that I have a little boy. To pray for wisdom and patience as a wife and a mother. I am thankful that she always (still) remind me of that – tho sometimes I am tired to hear that 🙂
i love your honesty here grace 🙂 thank you for sharing. bless you and your little boy. e.
My mom has always listened. She also understands when I need to be left alone – and I’ve always been grateful for that. Most people don’t know when to leave things be. She has come and apologized to me… even when I should be the one apologizing to her. She always read (and still reads!) books and stories with me. I love that.
What sticks out to me more than anything, though, is the time I was rummaging through the masses of unknown treasures in the attic and found something. It just looked like a normal binder, but I opened it up and it was something my mom had written.
And the dedication was to me.
I never told her. I just secretly copied down the words to the dedication and stowed it in my memory chest. I’ll never forget the feeling I experienced, opening up a box and finding my mom’s love for me typed on a page.
oh wow anna. thank you so much for sharing this. i have tears in my eyes–what an incredible gift. bless you. e.
Kerry @ Made For Real says
My mom was a pray-er, still is!!
isn’t it such a blessing to have prayer warriors for mothers, kerry? bless you, e.
My mother served others, especially the lonely and often forgotten elderly and did not mind adding ‘water’ to the soup when my pastor-dad brought more people home for dinner. A servant, indeed.
oh sandy, this touched me deeply. what a beautiful mother you have… she reminds me of Jesus. thank you so much for sharing. e.
When I was 12, my mom gave me and my sisters small purple New Testament bibles for Christmas. She told us to read the book of John. It was after reading the book of John and learning about Christ’s love for the world that He would die on a cross, three days later rise from the dead, and now ever lives to intercede for us, that I received Christ. That tiny little gift my mother gave me would soon secure my home in eternity; I asked Christ in my heart and received the gift of salvation that same year!!! I’m so blessed to have a praying mother. She’s now 72 years old, a recent widow, but she still dedicates her life on her knees praying for her children and their children! I love my mom so much 🙂
wow shari, what a beautiful testimony … i love this. and i love the book of John. bless you friend. e.
Denie Heppner says
my mother taught me hospitality. she demanded excellence. she prayed like a warrior. she taught me music. she showed me how to fight against prejudice and injustice. she was tiny, strong, opinionated, tender, open-hearted, fiery, demonstrative and hilarious. she was a contradiction in almost everything. she flew away to heaven far too soon…i think about her every day. oh, perhaps i should also mention that she was mostly ‘irish’. 😉
to fight against prejudice and injustice… this is so, so important and so rare. what an incredible person … i wish i could have met her.
One thing my mother did right was she always told me how much she loved me and that I was the light of her life. She was always there for me, whatever I needed; an additude adjustment, shoulder to cry, someone to celebrate mommy moments with, etc. She died 2 1/2 years ago and it’s still very difficult for me to grasp that I can’t just pick up the phone and call her.
i love that she told you that you were the light of her life, erika. this is so, so beautiful. i’m aching with you right now, for your loss.
Beth Werner Lee says
Erika, I get you. It’s been 6 years now, and while the pain isn’t sharp, I still wish I could call Mom. Funny, because Dad lives with us now for the past 4, but Mom is different, right? Thankful you have great memories, I send you love and hugs. Beth
Michelle Sanders Brinson says
My mom ALWAYS believed in me. I honestly believed I could do ANYTHING because she had enough faith in me that she encouraged me to follow my dreams. I never doubted myself and it took years… I guess when I was in college, that I realized there were some limitations… but by then I was determined and persistent. I am so grateful to my mom for helping me believe in myself.
michelle, a mother’s faith is a truly remarkable thing. thank you so much for sharing! bless you, e.
My mom prayed. She prayed nearly constantly. Sometimes she prayed loudly. Sometimes she prayed quietly in the middle of the night in her bedroom. She clung to Jesus. She was faithful to go to church whenever the door was open. She helped out any way she could. She loved me.
wow kat, what an incredible woman. i love how she prayed without ceasing. how she clung. thank you so much for sharing her with us. bless you, e.
My mom taught me from a very young age one of the most important verses of the Word: Love your neighbor as yourself. She taught me that everyone was my neighbor and that God loves a cheerful giver who gives from the depths of their hearts. She taught me to always be on the lookout for ways to help others. She not only preached this but modeled it in her everyday life, always going above and beyond to help and care for others. I know this fueled my desire to become a social worker, which I continue today, and also shaped me into the Christian woman I am today.
kiki, this is powerful. what a tremendous impact that one verse had on your mother’s life, and on yours. it guided the career path you chose! thank you so much for sharing. God bless you, e.
Beth Werner Lee says
My mom, she knew how to control, and I mean it positively. School teacher, and kids loved her. But she felt she had a cold mom so she prayed and asked God to make her loving. Boy did he ever!
I had a warm mom. She loved me so much. She was so real and usually right, and full of energy and time for me and love and giving and spoke all 5 love languages….
I pray most mornings for God to give me his love to give my people that day.
oh beth, yes! i totally believe in asking God to give us the attributes we lack… he can fill us up with HIS love. what a beautiful story. thank you so much for sharing. e.
Natasha d says
My mom’s advice to me after I had my first baby was to do what was right for my family, not what all of the parenting books said or my friends said but what truly would work for my baby, me and my family!! Thank you, mom!!!
such freedom in this advice, natasha. thank you so much for sharing. bless you, e.
Tanya in Alabama says
Forgive. Even though she had experienced abuse she forgave. Never speaking a bad word about him to us, always encouraging us to see the good and forgive the past.
wow tanya. this is hard truth. not only did your mom teach it, she lived it. beautiful and powerful. thank you, e.
My mother always made time for dancing. Music morning, noon and night. She loved on us and danced wildly and with laughter and it made the world spin so fast and beautiful I can still see it now when I close my eyes.
you always know how to make me cry, lisa-jo. xo
Jen @ Martymom's Musings says
She was there for me. She chose to do home daycare until I was 18 years old in order to always be home. What a glorious gift and I am trying to do the same for my kids.
I would love to win this book and give to my pastor to have available to share with others.
jen, having a stay-at-home mother is such a gift, especially in today’s world. i’m so fortunate that my job as a writer allows me to stay at home. i would LOVE for you to share this book with your pastor. i myself am a pastor’s daughter, and long for this book to bring freedom to the church. bless you for your heart. e.
Tasha T says
One thing my mom did right was teach me that I am who I say I am not what others think of me.
this is powerful truth, tasha. thank you so much for sharing. bless you, e.
Tonya Overstreet says
One thing my mother did right is that she took us to school and was home by the time we got home. She went on many of our school trips. She only worked part time so that she could be there for my brother and me and not miss out on the important stuff.
Linda Toney says
Mama is gone now for nearly two years. She did it all right. The most precious person in my life. She always said I wore my feelings on my sleeve. And I hear those words everyday. She should see me now. I do it even more. She is missed beyond words. Even on her worst days she was the best. I can’t wait to see her again. This is the longest I have ever been away from her. How I miss my mothe.
My mom is a great mother not a perfect mother, but none of us are. She raised 4 wonderful young ladies and I’m sure we gave her a run for her money at times. But we never went without anything ever. We had the most important thing anyone could or should want and that is LOVE. She always was in the kitchen cooking and letting us help also. I really didn’t understand what it took to be a MOM until I had my own children and you bet I called and thanked her alot throughout the years.
My mother battles an eating disorder and addiction. What she did wrong was pass that along to me. What she does right–from the time I was 13 unto this day– is wake each morning at the bottom of that pit, pick herself up, and march up the hill to the cross to set down that load of disorder and addiction, then she is able to dance through her day.
Most of the time. We cling together, she and I, although she is 3000 miles away; through voice mail messages and texting when our voices are too strained and cracking. We pray constantly for each other, and offer love regardless of life. Mom is a new widow, a new storm has blown her off course, and matured our relationship into more friends and sisters than mother and daughter, and the daily plodding up that hill goes on. So we would read this together, journal on it, feed on it and digest it together; and without a doubt praise God for your experience in our life.
emily wierenga says
oh noelle, this is such a beautiful and heartbreaking story. unfortunately the four winners have already been chosen, but the book is only $10 on amazon.com here: http://www.amazon.com/Chasing-Silhouettes-battling-eating-disorder/dp/0984009558/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1337742217&sr=8-1-fkmr1. i am so moved by your journey, and will be praying for healing for you and your mother. bless you. e.