I’d just had a conversation with my scared son. He’d come to me and admitted he and his girlfriend had physically gone too far. They hadn’t crossed every line, but enough he knew they were headed in a dangerous direction. He came to me and wanted help processing what to do. We considered this definition:
to com•pro•mise (kom’prə-mīz’)
v. 1. to expose or make vulnerable,
2. to make an unfavorable concession
or indulgence, 3. to weaken
That is exactly the way he felt — that he they had exposed their relationship to emotions they were not ready to handle. They had indulged in an area that God wanted to preserve, yet the world told them they deserved. And, it had weakened their relationship.
We sat on the back deck and processed the situation together, asking, “What happens when you delete “com” from the word compromise? You’re left with a ‘promise.’” I shared that he was made for more than compromise. He was made for God’s promises in every area of his life.
We read many empowering Scripture verses, seeking to filter every part of this situation through God’s truth. In the end, he and his girlfriend came to the realization they needed to break up. It’s really hard to put things in reverse after certain lines have been crossed.
I walked back into the house after that conversation with two things running through my brain. I was thrilled my son came to me to talk about such a sensitive issue. What an honor to breathe truth into his physical struggle.
But, I was also feeling a little panicked at the realities of parenting older teenagers! And, that feeling convinced me that I had to have some comfort food!
As I loaded my arms full of treats, I was suddenly struck by a gut wrenching question. How can I expect my son to apply truth to the area of his greatest physical struggle, but refuse to apply it to my area of greatest physical struggle?
That thought struck deep.
If I wanted to model what it looks like to live out truth in my physical struggles, I would have to break up with unhealthy choices. I realize chips and brownies are small concessions compared to a young couple compromising their purity. But, if one indulgence leads to two, and that leads to other indulgences, then the downward spiral is quite similar.
And whether we are talking about having premarital sex or other compromises that make us feel defeated, we must remember a crucial truth. We were made for God’s promises that lead to an abundant life of truth, strength, and joy. Satan’s purpose is to compromise God’s promised best. Don’t allow this thief to weaken, expose, or make us vulnerable. Let’s not compromise, and accept less than the peace and abundant life that God has promised is ours.
“The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give a rich and satisfying life” (John 10:10 NLT.)
Listen for this lie the thief will often whisper: “This will make you feel wonderful! You need this. You deserve this.”
Combat this lie with this: “You are a liar and a destroyer Satan. Yes, this may feel wonderful in the moment but how will I feel in the morning? I will not let your poisonous invitation for pleasure in the moment derail and defeat me. I am not made for compromise. I am made to live the reality of God’s promises.”
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