I was pregnant with our third and fourth children at the time. I can still remember what I was wearing (a formfitting v-neck, teal, and my favorite maternity jeans – thank God I wasn’t wearing sweats); it was early spring and late at night, past our toddlers’ bedtime. My husband was buckling our babies into their car seats when my phone rang loudly. I glanced, briefly, at the unfamiliar number before deciding not to answer. Chills engulfed my body and, having always been just a little bit psychic, I knew…not what…but that it would be torture to answer that call. Clearly, I’d suspected lies for quite some time.
The beep alerting me to a message sent waves of nauseous flutters through my heart; and I think, for a brief second, I considered simply letting it alone. Papa Bear knew in an instant and pleaded with me to give him the phone. “No,” I said as I held the phone to my ear with trembling hands. I held my breath and listened to the haughty confession of a sultry stranger, and my world cracked and crumbled like a coat of fresh paint disguising weathered wood like a lie.
I remember telling my husband to take me home; I asked only a few solemn questions on our ten minute drive. Somewhere from the depths of my soul, maybe simply out of love for my children, I mustered a fair amount of rational thought in those first few moments of my new reality. All I heard from my Savior was, “Hush, baby, shhhh….just hush.” But once we arrived home, after quickly tucking our wee ones into their cribs and turning on a loud fan to block the impending screaming, there was no longer any room for God.
Ecclesiastes 5:2-3 Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. As a dream comes when there are many cares, so the speech of a fool when there are many words.
My heroes all have one thing in common. When tragedy strikes, wisdom, instinct and valor demand that they fall straight to the ground in worship.
For me, the fall was slow and painful.
Maybe it’s because I had every right to scream…every right to wail, lecture, threaten, belittle, accuse. Even in those first few moments, though, God desired to protect me from a pattern of anger and bitterness. He desired to use my mouth to save my husband, to piece together what should have been an irrevocably torn two….to restore a family….to preserve a testimony. And in the days and weeks that followed, He gently guided me there.
Ephesians 6:19 Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.
As human beings, but especially as women, we cannot stand to see someone wounded that should be whole. And it’s nearly impossible to walk past an injury without a least commenting on it…especially when the injury is our own. We can talk a problem to death, can’t we? While our femininity has no bearing on our need for silence, wisdom often demands it.
If I’ve learned anything in my four and a half year journey since that night of precipice standing and the weeks of decision making that followed (and in truth, I have learned a lot), it’s that if one desires to be used by the Holy Spirit….if one desires to speak those few and powerful words that change lives….the first thing she must do is to sit still and listen.
To hush, baby, shhhh…just hush.
By Sarah Valente, Kingdom Twindom + 1
Leave a Comment
Jamie says
Beautifully written! And a wise reminder it seems we women need to hear and hear again. Thank you.
sarah valente says
Thanks, Jamie:)
Sara says
I have found myself so angry at the world yet when ready to scream and rage God askede to stay quiet, your writing was beautiful thank you for ssharing,
sarah valente says
So true. It helps to know that God asks the hard for OUR best! Thank you!
Kelly Capriotti Burton says
I don’t know how you ‘wrapped this up’ so neatly and succinctly, but it’s a stunning account of a messy, chaotic time. Thank you for being able to share it! I look forward to visiting your site!
sarah valente says
Thank you so much, Kelly:)
The Gentle Silence… | Memoria Arts says
[…] “Hush,Baby” at (in)courage. […]
Paula says
What an amazing incounter you had with your Lord. “Be still and know that I am God” is of value to all of us. Thanks for sharing from your heart.
sarah valente says
Ah, there is such peace from knowing that! You’re very welcome…thank you for your words:)
Deb Martell says
And His words to me were, “I am enough. I AM Enough.” And He was and He is and by His grace I have an intact family. Thank you for communicating a part of your story in such a beautiful way dear sister. Deb
sarah valente says
Bless you!
Mary Joy @Seeds of Encouragement Sewn with Grace says
I must say…”wow!”. God is with us through all of the yuckiness in our lives. Handling it in a way that is filled with God’s grace and mercy and power is the challenge we are faced with. Thank you for putting it in the way you did. Thank you for reminding to use our tongues to spread His love and grace not division and pain.
sarah valente says
And thank God that He is!:)
emily freeman says
Heartache and redemption – lovely, wise words.
sarah valente says
Thank you:)
deidra says
“We can talk a problem to death, can’t we?” Yes we can. And by we I mean me. What a gentle Saviour…there is so much wrapped up in those simple words: “Hush, baby, hush!” Not “be quiet” or – even worse “shut up.” And “baby.” Wow, an acknowledgment of where we are in time of crisis, and what we need. Thanks to Jesus for knowing us and loving us well.
This was good. Really good.
sarah valente says
Thank you for your beautiful comment! It’s true, we really are babes in the great big arms of a Savior!
Jules Green says
I have been there. Almost exactly. And when I spoke, I found my self saying the words “I forgive you” before I even realized it. That could only have been God, but you know that 🙂 God is so good at protecting me in all things, even those I don’t know about. Protecting, and yet allowing, even encouraging me to change for the better through all those unlivable moments. And so we live through them, through God:) Thank you so much for sharing and putting to words what I could not for a long time:)
sarah valente says
I’m sorry you’ve been there. But, yes, forgiveness is so accessible through Christ. What a wonderful Savior!
Kristin says
Wow. This is am amazing piece, and such a great lesson. I read it on my phone on the bus this morning, and I’ve been thinking about it since then. Thank you for this.
sarah valente says
Thank you, Kristin.
Stacey says
As women talking is so natural – a part of who we are. Any time with hold our tongue it is truly by the power of the Lord! I pray for more moments of silence and fewer words so that my words will be valued more not less!
Thanks for sharing this very true and very honest lesson today!
sarah valente says
Amen! That’s a prayer for us all:)
Linda says
This is amazing Sarah. It takes great love, I think, to learn the lesson of listening. It is one of those lessons I seem to have to learn over and over again. I am thankful for grace.
sarah valente says
ooo…me too!:)
Danielle says
Beautiful as always, Sarah. 🙂
sarah valente says
Thank you, Danielle:)
Jeri @godsdreamsforme says
You managed to turn something ugly into a beautiful truth. “…let your words be few”. That really spoke to me. Thank you for sharing this.
sarah valente says
I’m so glad. Thank you:)
Kristen says
Two years ago my husband and I were at a crossroads-he was flirting (pun intended) with the waters of destruction. The confrontation that ensued did wake the neighbors. Our path to remain together may have been much more smooth if only I had been able to hush… Your blog has been such a blessing to me as we continue our recovery and journey together! Thank you so much for all that you have shared of your life and your family.
sarah valente says
You are soooo welcome!:)
julie says
always amzing!
Sarah H says
Beautiful Sarah! Thank you so much for sharing even when it’s hard!
authentic jordan shoes says
it’s very good. thank you! it’s so helpful for me.
The Gentle Silence… | Memoria.Arts says
[…] “Hush,Baby” at (in)courage. […]
A Rear View Mirror » Kingdom Twindom +1 says
[…] on over! If you’re here because this is where you regularly hop, be sure to check out the (in)courage Daily Guest’s special post. It’s me, ahem, if you didn’t guess. I was very honored to share my words […]
Another Hush (It Ryhmes) | OPA! says
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