About the Author

Heather Gemmen Wilson loves to laugh. She says, "Through all the circumstances of my life, I have gained more than I have lost ... and I'm not just talking weight." Heather is married to her best friend, Lawrence W. Wilson, a pastor, and they have a colorful blended family of...

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  1. Heather, what a man you have!
    Wonderful post. You remind me that true love is not a feeling but a choice…or many choices throughout the day(s), week(s), and year(s). I am feeling convicted to make more of *my* choices good ones for love!
    Have a beautiful day!

  2. “.If you want love, don’t pursue it. Simply be loving. In other words, put his needs before your own. It may sound old-fashioned, but I believe a good wife dotes on her man, builds him up, and yes, even tries to look good for him. (A good husband does the same thing, but that’s not our business.) And we shouldn’t be surprised to discover that by submitting (yikes! I said it!), we gain so much more than we lose. That’s typical in the kingdom of God.”
    AMEN!! For those who haven’t done this, I want to pipe up and say it does truly make a difference and even though it is hard Kristen is right – what he does is not our business – we can’t be his Holy Spirit, only the Holy Spirit can so focus on God’s work in your life.

  3. A wonderful post for Valentines Day! It is so sad that Hollywood influences so many people. I had a friend that expected the romance of Titanic from her husband and now, they are divorced. So sad :0(. I know I often have expectations of my hubby that are way too high. It’s not enough that he works so hard to provide for us so I don’t “have” to work outside of the home. not enough that he sits with me and STILL holds my hand when we watch TV—still not enough that he would wake up early JUST to clean off my van after a snowstorm so I can just leave when I need to… NOPE! I need him to sing my praises and bring me roses each day?? I am, of course, being slightly sarcastic—I expect daisies! JK Thanks for the reminder that romance does not ALWAYS accompany love—unless of course percacet is involved :0)!!!

  4. “we’ll never find love if we’re looking for romance. We’ll only find romance. Maybe” – this is just fantastic! I couldn’t agree more!
    – Lisa-Jo

  5. The posts here all week have been so wonderful. It is so refreshing to hear a ‘real’ perspective of romance in marriage. I admit, it is still hard after 5 years of marriage when my husband doesn’t plan something ‘special’ for our anniversary- or we have 2 totally different veiws of what would be ‘romantic’ for the evenening to not have that feeling of dissapointment when things fall short of YOUR expectations. It is so true that you have to learn to accept that you can’t really force romance! You women are so wise and make my heart sing with all of your ‘romance’ wisdom this week! Keep it coming!

  6. someone recently told me that “intimacy is sitting down in your spouse’s chair and really understanding and feeling what it’s like to sit there.” I like that–the idea of choosing to sit in his chair and walk in his skin for a little while. thanks for posting.

  7. Today I went outside to start my van to get my little girl to the dentist. What I noticed was that my husband has come out in the early (dark) morning and shoveled our (very long) driveway before walking to work (because we are choosing to live with one vehicle for our budget’s sake). My van was washed (he doesn’t care about this b/c it is only going to covered again in our slushy weather but he knows I like it cleaner). And I was struck by what a wonderful man I have in my life. He really loves me and works hard, never grumbling, to provide for our family; he loves being a dad. He does not ‘measure up’ to a movie’s version of love/romance… he is so far superior!