About the Author

Tasha is a Korean American melancholy dreamer, wife to Matt, mom to three wild and wonderful humans. She writes about everyday life and cultural and ethnic identity, and writing has always been the way God has led her towards the hope of shalom. Her first book, Tell Me The Dream...

(in)side DaySpring: things we love
& you will too!
Find more at DaySpring.com
(in)side DaySpring:
things we love
& you will too!
Find more at
DaySpring.com
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  1. I have just moved into a new community this week and am anxious about missing the companionship of friends and neighbors I would see each day. My saving grace is that even though it is a little bit of a drive, I can still attend worship at “my” church. I am now longing for Sunday for another reason. I understand it takes time and I should relish each day as I rebuild in this new community. As we go into the darker, shorted days, I am trying to plan how to deal with this. I appreciate what you have written today. So timely for me.

    • Hi Madeline, congrats on the new community! I’m so glad you still have connections at other familiar places and I know that anxiety and loss you feel. As you adjust, I hope you can take the time you need to feel the losses and grieve, while also holding fast to hope for all that’s yet to take root and grow. I’m so glad the words here met you when you needed them.

  2. Tasha, how timely for me! I moved about 10 months ago, and it has been a season of loneliness and grief. I have even wanted to remain in this loneliness because it seems to take so much emotional effort to rebuild. Thanks for the reminder that this community process takes time! And God’s timing is good and perfect!

    • Susan, I know exactly what you mean when you say you’ve wanted to remain in the loneliness because of the emotional effort needed to rebuild. While I believe we are made for community, I also believe seasons of loneliness have treasures to offer us. It’s okay that you feel weary and tired and it’s no wonder – these transitions take a toll and people aren’t replaceable. I hope you will allow yourself the time and rest you need to grieve what was, while also letting that rest and the company of our God who comes near, minister to you and give you fuel, perspective, and readiness for what will bloom with time.

  3. Thank you for the encouragement. I’m happier every day listening and it helps me get through hard days

    • Ariel, I am so glad you were encouraged today. We at (in)courage are so happy that listening to the articles bring you joy and helps to sustain you. We’re so glad you are part of this community.

  4. I have been in a 6 year season of loneliness after leaving a city for the country. Never connected with anyone and it was very lonely. I’ve moved again, and the loneliness can be unbearable at times. This gave me so much encouragement. Thank you

    • Tricia, 6 years is a long time, and you not only left one place for another–it sounds like you left a different culture and lifestyle more than once. I’m glad the words here gave you courage today, and I’m so sorry you’ve felt the weight of loneliness as long as you have. It can be such a heavy weight.

      God who comes near, knows every hair on our head, and isn’t afraid of our biggest and weightiest feelings, be near to your beloved daughter, Tricia: as close as skin and bone. Deepen her intimacy with you and let her feel and know you in new, tangible, needed ways in this time. Provide for her in your mercy and abundant grace–nourish her relationally. Sustain her and help her on the days when the loneliness feels too thick to wade through. Please let her know she isn’t alone in ways she can feel and see. Amen.

  5. Thank you for this, Tasha! I haven’t moved for close to 40 years! But most of my neighbors have moved and been replaced many times in that time period. There are a few that have been here for the duration. I try to reach out to those, and the new ones several times each year, hoping to find a “bosom friend”. No luck so far. But I will keep delivering cookies and flowers. And someday…

    • Irene, I can still hear Megan Follow’s voice as Anne Shirley saying “bosom friend.” So many of us are wandering through life longing for that same thing as Anne, aren’t we? What a stable, steady person you must be to the neighborhood and place where you live. I can imagine that you have stories to tell about so many seasons and comings and goings where you are. Thank you for being that steady, stable place — it might not seem like much, but I know it has to minister to many and make so many others feel safe – like an oak tree reassuring and sheltering all the new growth around it (and delivering cookies and flowers too). I’m glad you are here in this online community and there, were you offer safe community to others. May God give you a bosom friend like you long for.

  6. I am grieving over what seems to be a lost friendship. I am not quite sure what is going on. I have asked for opportunities to talk. It has been a very sad time for me. A lot of uncertainty in life right now and I want to share this with that person. Thank you for this timely piece. I have prayed over it through many tears and finally have to keep giving it and this person over to God. They text me and tell me not to ever feel that we are not friends but we are not talking nor doing things together. Sigh. Thank you again.

    • Heidi, I’m so sorry for this loss or shift. The loss of a friend is so painful. I hope God will bring clarity between you and your friend and mending where things can mend. I’m glad the words here encouraged you and I pray you will be able to be gentle with yourself and your friend as you look for reconnection and grieve what’s changed. We are glad you are here, Heidi.

    • Thank you so much for this article. My husband are retired and just moved away from a community we had been active in for most of our lives. We moved to be closer to family. I am feeling so lost and sad. I miss the familiarity of my old community. I realize it will take time to rebuild what we left. It will just look different. I am praying for strength each day to be able to make the effort to “put myself out there” and make new friends and find more opportunities to get involved. Your writing helped to put things into perspective. Thank you.

  7. Thank you Tasha. Your words today touched my heart AND memories. The tears were good too
    We moved 2 yrs ago from a place we never thought we’d ever move from…but God had other plans! We are in transition and though I’m blessed, I’d really rather be in a house instead of an apartment. I guess I’m rather ungrateful for God’s roof….lol
    This I must remember….
    “There are unseen things at work in the relational seasons that feel empty”

    • Janet, I’m so glad the words resonated with you – knowing that they met others helps me not feel as alone too! Yes, I am also clinging to those unseen things at work and a God who calls beloved and longs to give us everything good and right. I hope you will give yourself grace and be gentle with your feelings as you move through transition and unmet longings and that God will surprise you with nearness and provision in the most unexpected ways. May God also sustain you through the darker, seemingly empty days. Thanks for sharing a bit with us and being here today.

  8. Thank you for writing this. It hit hard as we left a neighborhood that we lived in for 17 years. We built a great community and I miss it. We’ve been in our current home (and state) for 3 months with very little interaction (despite hosting a low-key gathering).

  9. Tasha,

    I have built a small community with my current church of 18+ years. While the drive is super long I never seemed to mind it much. Really grown to love the pastor & his wife. Earlier this year the pastor announced his retirement in December. I will miss them much. My job has changed & the drive to church is becoming way to much. I knew I needed to find a new/different church. God in His wisdom knew this was coming. When Covid hit our church shut down for a while. I attended my husband’s childhood church much closer to home. I grew to love the people & got involved a little. Now come January I will be attending that church. Sure I will miss the people & will try to stay in touch with some. It is time to move on & build new relationships.

    Blessings 🙂

  10. Tasha, I can’t tell you how much this blessed me. I experienced the truths you share many times as a military wife, and I’m experiencing it now as a woman who in some ways is having to rebuild her community, even though we haven’t moved. You remind me that while it may feel rather dark right now, good things grow in the dark. I can let time do its good work, and Jesus will see me through.

    Grateful for you, Tasha, and love you so.